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Am I stupid?????

So married for 16 yrs one kid
From England husband from Kentucky
Through our marriage every couple of years, he cheats. I forgive and we move on.
Recently he started a fb romance with an old flame who he had previously had great chemistry with.
He feels like it's the one that got away I think he was falling in love with her in his own way

He likes the newness of a relationship and was hurt young in life. He almost seams stuck emotionaly at that point. I want to enjoy all the phases of life.
He is vain and feels aging
He also seams needy and needs affirmation all the time of his wonderfulness!!!

Now it seams if things go askew instead of turning in he turns out.
I gave him an ultimatum her or me, he choose me but I could tell he was upset.
This is a first, before it was always sex, this time feelings were involve.
Men please give me input, am I stupid to stay?.
We get along for the most part w crept this part.
His excuse was our SS. Life was non existent which is true.
I still have faith he can turn around ?
Am I in denile ?
Help

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