Hello, I am a woman who feels trapped in her marriage.
I love my husband and we have 4 active but lovely kids. One of them can be quite difficult in terms of behaviour.
Before christmas I thought the marriage was over but I didn't want to leave him mainly through financial reasons and also our kids are all under 10 and I feel it they are too young to go through parents separating. But today after so much arguing I wonder if it is worth keeping it up from my side.
My husband is 20 years older than me. And to make a long story short, I feel he treats me like I'm one of his children. He scolds me over everything now. Today was I hadn't put the smaller two down for a nap while he was out swimming with his friend and I hadn't organised dinner on time before his relatives arrived. I was mainly on my own today with 4 kids on holiday breaks from school and their routine has not been re-established yet as we are also on our holiday away from home.
I don't think I would be like him if it was the other way around because I know it can be hard to do everything perfect depending on the children. Back home of course it is easier but I find it hard to appreciate his scolding when I'm 6 months pregnant and he has been away since 11am till 4pm doing his own stuff without kids while I'm at home with them. If something goes wrong it is always my fault even if it happened to be one of our children misbehaving, it is my fault because I'm an incompetent mother. and I genuinely feel because of his attitude towards me and he also intervenes when I discipline the children, our children also responds less when I discipline them. My 5 year old son says he likes being bold with me because Daddy is so grumpy.
I'm not suffering from any mental illness, and Im a medical professional. I've always been very independent but being married to my husband over the years has been quite tiring and I am so fed up with the constant criticism. I think he suffered from emotional abuse as a child from his mother who had depression most of her life. It isn't an excuse for his behaviour but it helps me cope with the situation.
I feel while my female friends complain about their husbands, I'm unique in my situation because my husband I would describe as being more aggressive and both verbally and emotionally abusive in our marriage. He does name call me when he is angry but this has reduced since I fought it back. We need marriage counselling but on account of recent house buying and managing 4 kids I've let it slide too many times.
I'm just reaching out to any other person in a similar situation and would like to learn from them how they dealt with or coped with the situation.
I love my husband and we have 4 active but lovely kids. One of them can be quite difficult in terms of behaviour.
Before christmas I thought the marriage was over but I didn't want to leave him mainly through financial reasons and also our kids are all under 10 and I feel it they are too young to go through parents separating. But today after so much arguing I wonder if it is worth keeping it up from my side.
My husband is 20 years older than me. And to make a long story short, I feel he treats me like I'm one of his children. He scolds me over everything now. Today was I hadn't put the smaller two down for a nap while he was out swimming with his friend and I hadn't organised dinner on time before his relatives arrived. I was mainly on my own today with 4 kids on holiday breaks from school and their routine has not been re-established yet as we are also on our holiday away from home.
I don't think I would be like him if it was the other way around because I know it can be hard to do everything perfect depending on the children. Back home of course it is easier but I find it hard to appreciate his scolding when I'm 6 months pregnant and he has been away since 11am till 4pm doing his own stuff without kids while I'm at home with them. If something goes wrong it is always my fault even if it happened to be one of our children misbehaving, it is my fault because I'm an incompetent mother. and I genuinely feel because of his attitude towards me and he also intervenes when I discipline the children, our children also responds less when I discipline them. My 5 year old son says he likes being bold with me because Daddy is so grumpy.
I'm not suffering from any mental illness, and Im a medical professional. I've always been very independent but being married to my husband over the years has been quite tiring and I am so fed up with the constant criticism. I think he suffered from emotional abuse as a child from his mother who had depression most of her life. It isn't an excuse for his behaviour but it helps me cope with the situation.
I feel while my female friends complain about their husbands, I'm unique in my situation because my husband I would describe as being more aggressive and both verbally and emotionally abusive in our marriage. He does name call me when he is angry but this has reduced since I fought it back. We need marriage counselling but on account of recent house buying and managing 4 kids I've let it slide too many times.
I'm just reaching out to any other person in a similar situation and would like to learn from them how they dealt with or coped with the situation.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment