Hours are long , mistakes in work are a constant fear, job security feels like a constant fear. E.g. Failing in my job and not being able to afford my rent. Also, the bad prospect of returning home to mum and dad, looking for jobs. I thought that getting a graduate job would lead to happiness and some sense of security. Have to admit though, the pressure is definitely a lonely experience, and having to hide all of my hesitations about my ability to keep going to everyone.
Any weekend time I get off work, admittedly I spend it drinking or seeing some prostitute. Well, escort, from a well known agency that entertains a lot of us in the industry. It is what I look forward to when I am working and keeps me sane, it is bad yes, but it keeps me sane. It is the only time when I ever really feel free and in controlled, in a non-trapped mindset.
Bad relationship with my parents and brother, so, any support network there is none-existent. Effectively, I am totally alone. I still haven't felt settled in to my new city (I am not originally from London) after a year, I just feel a lot older than I actually am (23).
So yeah, I just feel lost and if i am being honest, trapped.
Put the internet to work for you.
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