I'm sure this has been covered before, but, I'd really like to figure this out. I've been married 13 years and NEVER have had a deep conversation with my husband. He has no opinions about politics, religion, movies we've seen, his previous divorce, nor deep thoughts, feelings expressed about anything. If i try to talk to him about our relationship, he just says "why do you have to be such a *****" or "just go away, I'm not talking about this" I'm a very reasonable person, no tendency to fly off the handle. I don't scream or yell, belittle, hold grudges, name calling, etc.... i'm more of a calm talker, which gets me the "oh, so you think you're so perfect" response. Actually, I'm baffled. My husband wants sex, of course, but we've gotten to the land of awkwardness because there is no emotional connection due to his lack of communication. I try to ask him how he feels ("I'm ok") but I know something must be going on. He blames me for everything, but , of course, I don't take it personally, since I'm pretty realistic about what's going on. I express myself to him about my needs, but he simply blows me off. I've suggested marriage counseling, but he says no way. How can you be intimate and interested in someone who only spends his days either shopping online or showing you dumb youtube videos? I know, I picked him. We do have a very comfortable lifestyle, and I get that as long as I'm a happy go lucky person things are going well, but, I'm much deeper than he is. He wants porn sex, and I just want to take care of myself because I don't want to be uncomfortable dealing with his lack of communication skills. Any suggestions? I feel like I'm married to an emotionally retarded person (i know that's not currently pc to say, but still, it feels right)... and the problem is, we have a son that looks very highly at him and is learning to not share his feelings, which means some woman in the future is going to be as misera ble as me because he'll be just as emotionally blank/bland. We can't even argue on the slightest level, because conflict makes my husband so uncomfortable. What a weird experience. Any suggestions?
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