Hi all -
My mother and father are sensible caring individuals who do everything to keep my marriage intact. Unfortunately, my MIL and SIL intentionally aim to have the exact opposite effect.
My mother in law and husband's older sister have done everything in their power to ruin our marriage, suck the love out of our marriage and cause sheer agony.
Examples -
MIL is senseless/immature/dominating/controlling/childish/demanding/manner-less/a Woman Hitler...the mother on Everybody Loves Raymond truly looks like an ANGEL compared to this woman. SIL is just mean, conniving, rude, childish, temperamental, tamper throwing, proud, egotistical, and feels entitled to everyone's share of everything.
MIL and SIL scream at my hubby and put guilt trips on him. When they get what they want they have their artificial sweetener for him (positive reinforcement).
MIL forbids my husband from spending time with his father's side relatives due to jealousy that he will love them more
My hubby has NO relation with any of his cousins (his mom wanted no contact with any relative - she wanted their love all to herself)
MIL forbids her from seeing her best friend and aunt for the same reasons.
Tried to force us to move into her rented* house immediately after our marriage (but luckily I said no to this) - and then she immediately moved into an apartment next door to us in the same building, all the while complaining we don't live WITH her. We had to visit daily (otherwise get yelled at by her). I have an allergy to a food (and numerous times, she tried to feed it to me - pretending that she forgot about my allergy).
She puts HUGE guilt trips on her son (ie. how she is going to die if he doesn't take care of her etc). and makes underhanded, insulting, low statements to me in an attempt to hurt my feelings
To her friends - she plays the VICTIM card - "they wouldn't live with me in the house so I moved to live next door to them, etc." She is a physician! I would think a physician would have SOME sense.
She is insanely jealous of my sensible and loving mother - so she told her son/my husband that he cannot visit them (then anytime we had to go to my folks place - she made me go alone and made my hubby stay at her apt).
His sister - rude, dominating, drama-queen, very controlling, manipulative (just like her mother) - she found a guinea pig hubby who lives with her mother and her (his own mother is in another country and the poor woman doesn't even ask to see him because she is too afraid of these two dominating women).
His sister and mother - scream at him when he doesn't do something they want (their demands are so selfish and greedy it makes me sick) and brainwash him.
Even when he is happy - they get upset - because they want him to have a miserable marriage. They just cannot see him in a happy marriage. It irritates them so much that they actually tell him to stop doing loving things. We used to cook together, do fun activities together, go on vacations together with the money we both earned from our jobs. He was a great husband. They told him: stop cooking for her, stop going out, stop going on vacations and divorce her just so they can get him to move home with them again. Who does this?
At midnight - on many occasions - they have called him to mediate arguments between them (they have screaming tests at midnight). There is so much more...
Problems - their domination, drama queen nature, manipulation of him.
After 3 years of hell living next door to them, with God's grace, we moved - because my husband got a job in another state and I happily found work in the same city to get away from his crazy family (at the expense of also going away from mine). Now, they are doing everything they can to come here or make us go back there.
I am afraid to have kids with a crazy MIL/SIL. I love my husband and he is improving - he knows they can be crazy but will not say it to them (tells me to tell them they r being unreasonable).
One thing that kills me - is I miss MY family. I know moving back means having to deal with their nonsense/manipulation/attempts to destroy our marriage/guilt trips/control...
so lost, so confused...feels like a nightmare.
My mother and father are sensible caring individuals who do everything to keep my marriage intact. Unfortunately, my MIL and SIL intentionally aim to have the exact opposite effect.
My mother in law and husband's older sister have done everything in their power to ruin our marriage, suck the love out of our marriage and cause sheer agony.
Examples -
MIL is senseless/immature/dominating/controlling/childish/demanding/manner-less/a Woman Hitler...the mother on Everybody Loves Raymond truly looks like an ANGEL compared to this woman. SIL is just mean, conniving, rude, childish, temperamental, tamper throwing, proud, egotistical, and feels entitled to everyone's share of everything.
MIL and SIL scream at my hubby and put guilt trips on him. When they get what they want they have their artificial sweetener for him (positive reinforcement).
MIL forbids my husband from spending time with his father's side relatives due to jealousy that he will love them more
My hubby has NO relation with any of his cousins (his mom wanted no contact with any relative - she wanted their love all to herself)
MIL forbids her from seeing her best friend and aunt for the same reasons.
Tried to force us to move into her rented* house immediately after our marriage (but luckily I said no to this) - and then she immediately moved into an apartment next door to us in the same building, all the while complaining we don't live WITH her. We had to visit daily (otherwise get yelled at by her). I have an allergy to a food (and numerous times, she tried to feed it to me - pretending that she forgot about my allergy).
She puts HUGE guilt trips on her son (ie. how she is going to die if he doesn't take care of her etc). and makes underhanded, insulting, low statements to me in an attempt to hurt my feelings
To her friends - she plays the VICTIM card - "they wouldn't live with me in the house so I moved to live next door to them, etc." She is a physician! I would think a physician would have SOME sense.
She is insanely jealous of my sensible and loving mother - so she told her son/my husband that he cannot visit them (then anytime we had to go to my folks place - she made me go alone and made my hubby stay at her apt).
His sister - rude, dominating, drama-queen, very controlling, manipulative (just like her mother) - she found a guinea pig hubby who lives with her mother and her (his own mother is in another country and the poor woman doesn't even ask to see him because she is too afraid of these two dominating women).
His sister and mother - scream at him when he doesn't do something they want (their demands are so selfish and greedy it makes me sick) and brainwash him.
Even when he is happy - they get upset - because they want him to have a miserable marriage. They just cannot see him in a happy marriage. It irritates them so much that they actually tell him to stop doing loving things. We used to cook together, do fun activities together, go on vacations together with the money we both earned from our jobs. He was a great husband. They told him: stop cooking for her, stop going out, stop going on vacations and divorce her just so they can get him to move home with them again. Who does this?
At midnight - on many occasions - they have called him to mediate arguments between them (they have screaming tests at midnight). There is so much more...
Problems - their domination, drama queen nature, manipulation of him.
After 3 years of hell living next door to them, with God's grace, we moved - because my husband got a job in another state and I happily found work in the same city to get away from his crazy family (at the expense of also going away from mine). Now, they are doing everything they can to come here or make us go back there.
I am afraid to have kids with a crazy MIL/SIL. I love my husband and he is improving - he knows they can be crazy but will not say it to them (tells me to tell them they r being unreasonable).
One thing that kills me - is I miss MY family. I know moving back means having to deal with their nonsense/manipulation/attempts to destroy our marriage/guilt trips/control...
so lost, so confused...feels like a nightmare.
Put the internet to work for you.
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