Hey everyone,
So, we've been together a long time. We can pretty much play each other like a fiddle at this point - he knows what I like, and vice versa. However, one thing that he doesn't care for, and has never cared for, is me going down on him.
And this makes me sad. We were both virgins when we met (in our teens) and we learned everything with each other. We've tried BJs on a number of occasions over the years, but he never asked for them and never had all that much of a reaction to them when I did them. Finally, about two years ago, he admitted that he doesn't really care for them. He says he doesn't DISLIKE them... he actually finds them kind of "boring." He says that I have skilled hands and he would much prefer manual over oral stimulation.
The thing is... I like having him in my mouth :o It's so intimate and empowering, all at the same time. But now I feel guilty if I go down on him because I feel like I am being selfish, and subsequently boring him for my own enjoyment.
So here are my questions:
I know that if it was something that he didn't like or that made him uncomfortable, I would totally never push him into it. But here, he seems rather indifferent. It also bothers me, and I recognize that this is on ME.... It makes me feel like a failure. Since I am his only sexual partner, I feel like I must be bad at it, and THAT's why he doesn't like it. I have actually talked technique with a guy friend of mine, to see if I am doing something poorly, but he said my technique sounded like a darn good time (I don't forget about the jewels, and spend plenty of time paying attention to the perineum and even a little anal play). So I really have no clue.
Have you ever heard of a guy who doesn't like BJs?
So, we've been together a long time. We can pretty much play each other like a fiddle at this point - he knows what I like, and vice versa. However, one thing that he doesn't care for, and has never cared for, is me going down on him.
And this makes me sad. We were both virgins when we met (in our teens) and we learned everything with each other. We've tried BJs on a number of occasions over the years, but he never asked for them and never had all that much of a reaction to them when I did them. Finally, about two years ago, he admitted that he doesn't really care for them. He says he doesn't DISLIKE them... he actually finds them kind of "boring." He says that I have skilled hands and he would much prefer manual over oral stimulation.
The thing is... I like having him in my mouth :o It's so intimate and empowering, all at the same time. But now I feel guilty if I go down on him because I feel like I am being selfish, and subsequently boring him for my own enjoyment.
So here are my questions:
- Am I being selfish for still wanting to give BJs?
- Should I just let it go, or should I see if there is some way that I can improve my technique so he can enjoy it more?
I know that if it was something that he didn't like or that made him uncomfortable, I would totally never push him into it. But here, he seems rather indifferent. It also bothers me, and I recognize that this is on ME.... It makes me feel like a failure. Since I am his only sexual partner, I feel like I must be bad at it, and THAT's why he doesn't like it. I have actually talked technique with a guy friend of mine, to see if I am doing something poorly, but he said my technique sounded like a darn good time (I don't forget about the jewels, and spend plenty of time paying attention to the perineum and even a little anal play). So I really have no clue.
Have you ever heard of a guy who doesn't like BJs?
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