Anon, I hope.
Right. Me and my ex broke up just under a month ago, after being together for about 5 months. We met at the start of uni, got on really well, got off with each other loads on nights out etc etc before making it official a few weeks later. Because it was the start of uni, she was my best friend and I saw her much much more than anyone else - there were times we literally spent all day and night together. Following from this, we had the same group of friends around us. She also does my subject, so we even spoke about essays, lectures etc ... you probably get the idea. We got on ridiculously well.
Anyway, it was all going great and seemed to be fine over the hols, when I visited her and texted practically every day. But then, just before we were going to go back to uni, things were really different. She was more reserved, took ages to reply to texts, didn't ask to skype me until I instigated it and even then seemed withdrawn... like she just changed entirely. I tried to think she was a bit down or was busy at home, but I knew something was up really.
When we got back to uni, it was obvious that things had changed. She seemed completely indifferent - not cold, but just weird. Then she said the words we all dread - 'We need to talk'. She said she wanted to be more independent, and didn't want the distraction of a relationship from her uni work. Kinda made me wonder why she agreed to go out with me in the first place, but hey. She said we spent too much time together, but I don't see how that entails breaking up - surely that should mean revising the time we spend together, not getting rid of the relationship completely!
Now usually, you'd think that despite the strange nature of the reasons given how intense the relationship was before, those would be understandable reasons for breaking up. But now comes the confusing and quite annoying part.
Less than a week after we broke up, a male friend from her home area who is at uni relatively nearby came to visit her. This friend is her best friend's recent ex-boyfriend. And they got off together in a club, and I'm certain they slept in the same bed. This was upsetting enough, seeing as it was so so soon after the break-up, but I tried to think that they were both on the rebound and kinda drunk. But then I thought, maybe this originally happened over the holidays, explaining her strange attitude towards me? Questions questions.
Then, a few weeks later, I find out that she's been speaking a lot with a guy in the year above, and has gone clubbing and drinking with him. He came round her room when I was there (I was giving her a book) and said he'd see her later... pretty obvious something going on there.
And that was what really confused and angered me. She broke up with me, apparently to focus on work, yet she's got something pretty consistent going on with someone else? And so soon after breaking up with me? Combine this with the earlier thing with the best friend's ex, and I'm seriously confused over what she's really thinking. I mean it was all so good and seemingly mutual before, and all of a sudden she's completely over me and is getting with people all over the place.
But the main issue is that she still wants to be friends, and given we do the same subject, it's very hard to not see her. And she was my best friend, so I kinda want to be friends with her - we get on too well not to be. But I don't know what's changed with her, what she really thinks... it's all gone tits up.
Was she lying when she said why she was breaking up with me? Did she cheat before? What's going on with this older guy, is she just lonely? Can we still be friends? And what the hell should I do?! HELP!!!!!
Right. Me and my ex broke up just under a month ago, after being together for about 5 months. We met at the start of uni, got on really well, got off with each other loads on nights out etc etc before making it official a few weeks later. Because it was the start of uni, she was my best friend and I saw her much much more than anyone else - there were times we literally spent all day and night together. Following from this, we had the same group of friends around us. She also does my subject, so we even spoke about essays, lectures etc ... you probably get the idea. We got on ridiculously well.
Anyway, it was all going great and seemed to be fine over the hols, when I visited her and texted practically every day. But then, just before we were going to go back to uni, things were really different. She was more reserved, took ages to reply to texts, didn't ask to skype me until I instigated it and even then seemed withdrawn... like she just changed entirely. I tried to think she was a bit down or was busy at home, but I knew something was up really.
When we got back to uni, it was obvious that things had changed. She seemed completely indifferent - not cold, but just weird. Then she said the words we all dread - 'We need to talk'. She said she wanted to be more independent, and didn't want the distraction of a relationship from her uni work. Kinda made me wonder why she agreed to go out with me in the first place, but hey. She said we spent too much time together, but I don't see how that entails breaking up - surely that should mean revising the time we spend together, not getting rid of the relationship completely!
Now usually, you'd think that despite the strange nature of the reasons given how intense the relationship was before, those would be understandable reasons for breaking up. But now comes the confusing and quite annoying part.
Less than a week after we broke up, a male friend from her home area who is at uni relatively nearby came to visit her. This friend is her best friend's recent ex-boyfriend. And they got off together in a club, and I'm certain they slept in the same bed. This was upsetting enough, seeing as it was so so soon after the break-up, but I tried to think that they were both on the rebound and kinda drunk. But then I thought, maybe this originally happened over the holidays, explaining her strange attitude towards me? Questions questions.
Then, a few weeks later, I find out that she's been speaking a lot with a guy in the year above, and has gone clubbing and drinking with him. He came round her room when I was there (I was giving her a book) and said he'd see her later... pretty obvious something going on there.
And that was what really confused and angered me. She broke up with me, apparently to focus on work, yet she's got something pretty consistent going on with someone else? And so soon after breaking up with me? Combine this with the earlier thing with the best friend's ex, and I'm seriously confused over what she's really thinking. I mean it was all so good and seemingly mutual before, and all of a sudden she's completely over me and is getting with people all over the place.
But the main issue is that she still wants to be friends, and given we do the same subject, it's very hard to not see her. And she was my best friend, so I kinda want to be friends with her - we get on too well not to be. But I don't know what's changed with her, what she really thinks... it's all gone tits up.
Was she lying when she said why she was breaking up with me? Did she cheat before? What's going on with this older guy, is she just lonely? Can we still be friends? And what the hell should I do?! HELP!!!!!
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