This question is mostly directed at the ladies. My wife and I have been married 8 years. Overall I am satisfied with our sex life. She enjoys intercourse; to include multiple positions, she also enjoys giving me oral sex. But when I go down on her she usually ends it within a minute or so saying she just wants to have sex. Shes sort of "clams up" and tries to push me on to other things. I know I've brought her to orgasm once or twice this way years ago but she just won't let me do it anymore.
At first I just tried to go along with it but after a while I kept trying to go down on her and I got the same response. I've told her I enjoy it, which is true. I've asked her tactfully to just give it a chance and it doesn't work. I ask how I should do it and what she likes best. Did I say I tell her I enjoy it? I try to make sure I convey this part and I try to not be pushy about it. I've ruined more than one night of sex over this issue.
All of my previous girlfriends enjoyed cunnilingus. I genuinely want I do it for her because part of enjoying sex for me is bringing my wife to orgasm, which is rare. To be honest, I've admitted to her that it's "about me" as much as it's about her. It's a part of sex that I enjoy and am not willing to let go. Satisfying her is a big part of it for me but she doesn't seem to understand.
So ladies, am I being stubborn? Do I just need to let it go? Is this common? As a guy I just can't seem to relate. It's an important aspect of sex for me and I honestly feel like something is missing and our sex life is less than fulfilling as long as she is resistant to receiving oral sex. Does anyone have any suggestions? I'm convinced she would enjoy it if she just let go because I can tell it's hitting the right spots for the 30 seconds she lets me do it. I don't know if she's self conscious about it or worried about how she will act if it feels good or what. Again, I tell her over and over that I love being there and doing this for her so she shouldn't feel weird about it. I honestly love the sights, smells and sensations of it all. What can I do?
Help me make my wife comfortable with receiving oral.
Thanks to anyone who can give me any feedback or ideas.
JR
At first I just tried to go along with it but after a while I kept trying to go down on her and I got the same response. I've told her I enjoy it, which is true. I've asked her tactfully to just give it a chance and it doesn't work. I ask how I should do it and what she likes best. Did I say I tell her I enjoy it? I try to make sure I convey this part and I try to not be pushy about it. I've ruined more than one night of sex over this issue.
All of my previous girlfriends enjoyed cunnilingus. I genuinely want I do it for her because part of enjoying sex for me is bringing my wife to orgasm, which is rare. To be honest, I've admitted to her that it's "about me" as much as it's about her. It's a part of sex that I enjoy and am not willing to let go. Satisfying her is a big part of it for me but she doesn't seem to understand.
So ladies, am I being stubborn? Do I just need to let it go? Is this common? As a guy I just can't seem to relate. It's an important aspect of sex for me and I honestly feel like something is missing and our sex life is less than fulfilling as long as she is resistant to receiving oral sex. Does anyone have any suggestions? I'm convinced she would enjoy it if she just let go because I can tell it's hitting the right spots for the 30 seconds she lets me do it. I don't know if she's self conscious about it or worried about how she will act if it feels good or what. Again, I tell her over and over that I love being there and doing this for her so she shouldn't feel weird about it. I honestly love the sights, smells and sensations of it all. What can I do?
Help me make my wife comfortable with receiving oral.
Thanks to anyone who can give me any feedback or ideas.
JR
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