Hey,
It's been about two/three weeks since I posted on here, in which I was actually feeling rather suicidal and depressed. I'm still depressed, but can think more rationally that I was a few weeks back. I'll keep this simple....
Basically, I still have feelings for my ex, she still loves me also and ever since (post-breakup) my emotions went from missing her, to hating the idea of her, to resenting her to feeling jealous of all the new people in her life. You name it, I've felt that emotion.
I spend weeks hating her, looking at her Facebook, got to the point I wanted to just end it. Of course I didn't but I was close. I think that they were just displaced emotions, in which I thought I hated her when in fact I still loved her. We started talking about a week ago, ever since been really flirty and upbeat and she admitted to me she misses me, and gets really emotional- told me she's never loved anyone more than me etc etc.
She still gives me mixed feelings because she gets agitated if I ask her stuff because she believes I still don't trust her, and she wants me too. The reason we broke was because I thought she was cheating on me and didn't trust, so I ended it. She wants to give it another go.
I dunno what to do because I love her, but I'm still clearly having mental health issues; anxiety, depression etc. I go through cycles of emotion. Part of me wants it to work, the other tells me it's bad news. I'm going to see her soon, and I miss her so much. Were both very flirty and horny, affectionate (she wants to have sex with me) but I dunno how far the road will take me- any advice?
I'm currently in a referal for CBT therapy and on meds.
Put the internet to work for you.
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