From what I've read, in trying to understand certain things about affairs and WS's. Is that for many, cheating was a boundary they once believed themselves incapable of crossing. They just could never do that to anyone. Perhaps along the sames lines as a relatively moral/normal/sane person would believe they were incapable of molesting a child, murdering someone, committing a robbery ect... Just don't have it in them, so to speak.
I imagine this will be an uncomfortable topic for many. The questions following are for the WS's.
Were there boundaries within your affairs? Lines you believe you would have never crossed?
Examples:
*Would have never sworn on the lives of your children to your BS that you were telling the truth whilst lying?
*Would never do certain things sexually within your affair/affairs, that you felt would be over the top or too humiliating/devastating to your BS?
*Trash-talking your BS behind his/her back ect...
*Cheating within the sanctity of your BS home/bed?
*Having sex with BS and AP in the same day, kissing BS after recently engaging in oral sex with AP?
*Choosing to convince your BS they have genuine mental problems in their suspicions rather than admit guilt? I.E. You'd rather have you BS medicated or committed for nonexistent issues than confess or would rather you're BS question their own sanity than you being truthful?
__________________________________
Now, if you had no boundaries to speak of within your affairs or no limit to the lengths you would go to conceal it from your BS, why do you believe this was in hindsight? And if you did have such boundaries, what do you believe enabled you to hurdle the boundary of fidelity and yet keep other boundaries in tact?
I've read a lot about the "fog" and "compartmentalization". I don't really buy into either. But, if you have experienced this "fog" or possess this ability of "compartmentalization" and believe these things to be very real. How far do you believe you could potentially utilize these tools to perpetrate things you thought yourself incapable of? Or what do you believe the limits are of the things you could do utilizing these tools?
Under the right circumstances do you believe you could use "fog" and "compartmentalization" to torture animals, molest children, commit rape, maim someone ect...?
My intent is not offend or insult anyone in this line of questioning/reasoning. I'm genuine in my desire to understand these things, but will understand if I do not get many replies.
I may do a follow up to this thread concerning my own experiences.
Thx in advance to any WS's who take the time to reply or BS's who reply by proxy or add to the thread with their own observations/experiences, it's greatly appreciated. Would love to hear from both sides and as many perspectives as possible.
Thx all!
I imagine this will be an uncomfortable topic for many. The questions following are for the WS's.
Were there boundaries within your affairs? Lines you believe you would have never crossed?
Examples:
*Would have never sworn on the lives of your children to your BS that you were telling the truth whilst lying?
*Would never do certain things sexually within your affair/affairs, that you felt would be over the top or too humiliating/devastating to your BS?
*Trash-talking your BS behind his/her back ect...
*Cheating within the sanctity of your BS home/bed?
*Having sex with BS and AP in the same day, kissing BS after recently engaging in oral sex with AP?
*Choosing to convince your BS they have genuine mental problems in their suspicions rather than admit guilt? I.E. You'd rather have you BS medicated or committed for nonexistent issues than confess or would rather you're BS question their own sanity than you being truthful?
__________________________________
Now, if you had no boundaries to speak of within your affairs or no limit to the lengths you would go to conceal it from your BS, why do you believe this was in hindsight? And if you did have such boundaries, what do you believe enabled you to hurdle the boundary of fidelity and yet keep other boundaries in tact?
I've read a lot about the "fog" and "compartmentalization". I don't really buy into either. But, if you have experienced this "fog" or possess this ability of "compartmentalization" and believe these things to be very real. How far do you believe you could potentially utilize these tools to perpetrate things you thought yourself incapable of? Or what do you believe the limits are of the things you could do utilizing these tools?
Under the right circumstances do you believe you could use "fog" and "compartmentalization" to torture animals, molest children, commit rape, maim someone ect...?
My intent is not offend or insult anyone in this line of questioning/reasoning. I'm genuine in my desire to understand these things, but will understand if I do not get many replies.
I may do a follow up to this thread concerning my own experiences.
Thx in advance to any WS's who take the time to reply or BS's who reply by proxy or add to the thread with their own observations/experiences, it's greatly appreciated. Would love to hear from both sides and as many perspectives as possible.
Thx all!
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