Hi everyone, first I'm glad I found this site and thanks in advance for everyone's input, with that being said, I have been married for 15 years with 3 kids, 2 in the household still, without giving a life story, here is my situation, I have a stepson (17) from my wife's previous marriage whom has found his way to drugs and numerous arrests/citations as a result he has been been sentenced to a year of incarceration, and as a result my wife feels this a great injustice, now let's back up a few years, although he is not my biological son I treated him as so and always will and I did everything within my power to curb this behavior, however my wife constantly undermines my discipline measures, to the point where she was willing to get a p him a medical marijuana card pm because she feels it "helps" him. She has now stated she would like to sue the court because how dare them lock him up. She spends every waking hour talking to friends about how wrong the cou rt is in enforcing the law. This goes approx 8-10 hours a day. She also maintains the same reckless relationship with our biological daughter, whom once again is spiraling out of control and my discipline measures are undermined and laughed off.
2nd issue is sex, looking back in time the sex was to be expected with no complaints and adventurous, within the past 2 years it has dwindled down to twice a month, I will say also that in the 15 years of marriage she expects oral pleasure but has never once reciprocated, and when we do engage it is strictly 1 position "missionary" and never any other position, she does not want to kiss, and generally will make requests before hand such as foreplay on her for approx 5 minutes or more beforehand, I have attempted numerous times to talk about these issues, but I am told that I obviously must have a major sex problem because I want it more than twice a month, as a result, I got fed up, and told her that I do not want to bring up sex anymore, and let's consider it something we will not do anymore, as a result she stated that the conversation was too much to deal with. Obviously as a man I enjoy sex, but I have found it very easy to simply stop, additionally , when she does want it out of the 2 times a month she will stop at nothing until we do it.
3rd and lastly although there are numerous other issues, we are dealing with some tax issues that I have been handling solely, I have explained that i need help with these impending issues, because ignoring then can put us in a very negative legal situation, and she would simply rather ignore the issue, or play internet games with outer 14 year old daughter. I have explained that the issues are serious enough with ignorance that we will lose everything and then some, but she chooses the above or to simply plan out what she will bringing for our stepson when she has her visits twice a week such as cupcakes or what prefer the institution will allow.
We have done the counseling route numerous times, my question is A)
Am I doing the right thing by simply saying the hell with sex and putting it our my mind, or do I oblige when she finally feels like engaging. It more or less makes me feel like a sucker if I do oblige, and the same behavior continues to occur.
B) filing for separation is an option as the tax issue is quite severe and it would prompt her to address the situation does that seem reasonable?
2nd issue is sex, looking back in time the sex was to be expected with no complaints and adventurous, within the past 2 years it has dwindled down to twice a month, I will say also that in the 15 years of marriage she expects oral pleasure but has never once reciprocated, and when we do engage it is strictly 1 position "missionary" and never any other position, she does not want to kiss, and generally will make requests before hand such as foreplay on her for approx 5 minutes or more beforehand, I have attempted numerous times to talk about these issues, but I am told that I obviously must have a major sex problem because I want it more than twice a month, as a result, I got fed up, and told her that I do not want to bring up sex anymore, and let's consider it something we will not do anymore, as a result she stated that the conversation was too much to deal with. Obviously as a man I enjoy sex, but I have found it very easy to simply stop, additionally , when she does want it out of the 2 times a month she will stop at nothing until we do it.
3rd and lastly although there are numerous other issues, we are dealing with some tax issues that I have been handling solely, I have explained that i need help with these impending issues, because ignoring then can put us in a very negative legal situation, and she would simply rather ignore the issue, or play internet games with outer 14 year old daughter. I have explained that the issues are serious enough with ignorance that we will lose everything and then some, but she chooses the above or to simply plan out what she will bringing for our stepson when she has her visits twice a week such as cupcakes or what prefer the institution will allow.
We have done the counseling route numerous times, my question is A)
Am I doing the right thing by simply saying the hell with sex and putting it our my mind, or do I oblige when she finally feels like engaging. It more or less makes me feel like a sucker if I do oblige, and the same behavior continues to occur.
B) filing for separation is an option as the tax issue is quite severe and it would prompt her to address the situation does that seem reasonable?
Put the internet to work for you.
| |
| Recommended for you |
No comments:
Post a Comment