This is for discussion only, so don't beat me up. I think that divorce might increase the chance of reconciliation.
I would tell my wayward spouse that she had broken our contract and had been downgraded. Marriage is for those that can trust each other.
She will have paid a price for her actions. I might work on forgiving but the divorce would be a tangible symbol of what she did. It's also a symbol that I can live without her and will not tolerate it again. Divorced people can easily go their separate ways, so she's on probation. I also wouldn't be as hurt if my ex-wife cheated on me. I wouldn't be quite the fool that I was the first time.
The betrayed spouse often feels resentful if everything just goes back to the way it was before. They're devastated and triggering. The wayward spouse has their plan "B" and fun memories. If the betrayed spouse complains, their reply is, "How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?" If years pass the betrayed spouse begins to feel foolish for complaining and the wayward spouse says, "Just get over it."
Strike while the iron is hot. Divorce makes the 180 more credible.
If you can't afford a second place to live or kids are involved, you don't have to move out just because you're divorced.
There is a post here where a "rock star" professor fit another man's wife into his schedule for a one-time nooner before he left for another date. Her classmates were impressed and she bragged about it in detail to her husband. She had no remorse for a year then felt terrible and spent decades making it up to her husband. That wasn't enough for him until recently. A divorce might have snapped her out of it in less than a year and helped her husband heal more quickly. He would have felt that she paid a price too.
If the betrayed spouse gets to the point that they can trust 100%, they can get remarried.
The main negative thing I can think of is health insurance issues.
What do you think?
I would tell my wayward spouse that she had broken our contract and had been downgraded. Marriage is for those that can trust each other.
She will have paid a price for her actions. I might work on forgiving but the divorce would be a tangible symbol of what she did. It's also a symbol that I can live without her and will not tolerate it again. Divorced people can easily go their separate ways, so she's on probation. I also wouldn't be as hurt if my ex-wife cheated on me. I wouldn't be quite the fool that I was the first time.
The betrayed spouse often feels resentful if everything just goes back to the way it was before. They're devastated and triggering. The wayward spouse has their plan "B" and fun memories. If the betrayed spouse complains, their reply is, "How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?" If years pass the betrayed spouse begins to feel foolish for complaining and the wayward spouse says, "Just get over it."
Strike while the iron is hot. Divorce makes the 180 more credible.
If you can't afford a second place to live or kids are involved, you don't have to move out just because you're divorced.
There is a post here where a "rock star" professor fit another man's wife into his schedule for a one-time nooner before he left for another date. Her classmates were impressed and she bragged about it in detail to her husband. She had no remorse for a year then felt terrible and spent decades making it up to her husband. That wasn't enough for him until recently. A divorce might have snapped her out of it in less than a year and helped her husband heal more quickly. He would have felt that she paid a price too.
If the betrayed spouse gets to the point that they can trust 100%, they can get remarried.
The main negative thing I can think of is health insurance issues.
What do you think?
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