So I just emailed the lawyer for appt. This is happening. I need some advice before I pull the trigger on this first so the first meeting with the lawyer should clear up some things.
When I boil this all down what makes it impossible for me to go forward with the marriage is her willingness to lie to about big things and her unwillingness to work on changing that. Her EA's, money, and some other big lies I don't want to get into. If it was not for that I'd probably work on it longer, but she is making no effort to get passed her fast and loose relationship with the truth. Her way of dealing with difficult and hard things is just to lie and I can't live with that. I have pushed her toward IC to deal with her the lies and narcissism and MC to bring us closer, but she won't go and the rest of her "work" on the marriage is appeasement, duty sex, and rug sweeping. The EAs are over (at least for now) and things are calm friendly even a lot of fun at times, but the party is over and reality is finally here to stay.
I am anxious about where this is heading. I don't expect violence from my wife but almost anything else is on the table. She can be very vindictive and nasty.
She might get extremely confrontational and nasty.
She might lie about me to friends or authorities.
She might destroy my property and things I care about in the house.
She might drag this on as long as possible to avoid getting a job.
If I am lucky and she has any remorse at all for what she has done, I can just talk her into moving on quickly with half of everything and a big alimony check for a few years.
I need to work out timing, when to tell friends and relatives. Once I do that this will get very real.
When I boil this all down what makes it impossible for me to go forward with the marriage is her willingness to lie to about big things and her unwillingness to work on changing that. Her EA's, money, and some other big lies I don't want to get into. If it was not for that I'd probably work on it longer, but she is making no effort to get passed her fast and loose relationship with the truth. Her way of dealing with difficult and hard things is just to lie and I can't live with that. I have pushed her toward IC to deal with her the lies and narcissism and MC to bring us closer, but she won't go and the rest of her "work" on the marriage is appeasement, duty sex, and rug sweeping. The EAs are over (at least for now) and things are calm friendly even a lot of fun at times, but the party is over and reality is finally here to stay.
I am anxious about where this is heading. I don't expect violence from my wife but almost anything else is on the table. She can be very vindictive and nasty.
She might get extremely confrontational and nasty.
She might lie about me to friends or authorities.
She might destroy my property and things I care about in the house.
She might drag this on as long as possible to avoid getting a job.
If I am lucky and she has any remorse at all for what she has done, I can just talk her into moving on quickly with half of everything and a big alimony check for a few years.
I need to work out timing, when to tell friends and relatives. Once I do that this will get very real.
Put the internet to work for you.
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