Over a year ago (yes, it is that long, I am even more tragic than I realized) I discovered that the man I was deeply in love with had cheated on me multiple times and even had a separate girlfriend that he was dating under an assumed name. He ripped my heart out of my chest and hurt me more than I could imagine.
I did all the right things. I broke up with him, got rid of everything that reminded me of him, deleted his number, texts, voicemails. I managed to refrain from castrating him with a knife and in doing so avoided jail, which was nice. I tried to move on, I leaned on friends for support, I went out and partied, met new people, had a good time.
And yet still, a year later, when it's late at night and my friends are all asleep I sit and cry my eyes out over a man that is nothing more than a scumbag. Logically I know this; I know he is not a very nice human being, is very destructive and is really not worth my tears. But I love him. I am still deeply in love with him and I never really stopped. But I will never allow myself to go back with him after what he did to me and I am so angry that MY life is being ruined. I can't form relationships with other people because I'm still in love with him. No-one else compares. But he is the one in the wrong. It feels like I am still being punished for something that was never my doing in the first place.
How do you stop loving someone? I'd give anything to hate him. Any advice appreciated x
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