I have posted here before about some problems I have been having with my husband. But over the last 2 months things seem to have been going in the right direction. We had a 2 week holiday which actually went really well and when he was away working, phoning every night on skype, it has been good and not strained like before.
A bit of background -together 23 years, married 20. 2 daughters 10 and 15. Hubby works overseas 4 weeks away and 4 weeks home and has always worked away.
He came home early Thursday morning and things wee normal and all happy to see each other. Friday was spent together running a few errands and then in the pool in the afternoon having a few ****tails. everything was really nice and relaxing. One of our neighbours popped round without his wife so hubby is like "where is she" and goes to visit. Our eldest goes too which happens often.
Anyway D comes homes and says that dad is complaining to friend that can make his own decisions, do what he wants, feels like a stranger in his own home, etc. I was a bit shocked by this but said I would speak to him. H comes home and I calmly asked what he was talking about and that if there were any problems why didnt he tell me. That when he kicked off. Shouting at me, saying that I told him to leave (which I never have), being really aggressive and angry toward our daughter.
He came to bed but got up about 30 mins later and slammed the bedroom door. I followed and asked him why he was outside (with a beer) and was told "I am going to kick her out the house". Calmly again I said that she told me as she was worried why he was being like this. I got no answer and left him outside. He fell asleep out there and came to bed during the night.
Today I feel so angry and hurt and , right or wrong, I have hardly spoken to him. He took our youngest D out for awhile and for lunch but he has not spoken or even looked at our eldest. He has also spent the last 9 1/2 hours outside by himself drinking beer, only coming in to use the toilet.
I am so confused. He says he struggles to fit in but makes no or little effort. He drinks 10 - 15 beers every night when home (cant drink at work which he constantly tells me). The kids keep asking him to not drink so much so they can do stuff but he digs his heels in and refuses. "Your not telling me what to do" When I try to start a conversation about stuff he gets angry, aggressive and tries to intimidate, esp the kids. Our eldest D has disliked him for months now but he doesnt feel he needs to try to mend bridges and expects her or us to make the first move to apologise.
Does he want to try, doesnt know how to try, or is just a child? I really dont know anymore.
A bit of background -together 23 years, married 20. 2 daughters 10 and 15. Hubby works overseas 4 weeks away and 4 weeks home and has always worked away.
He came home early Thursday morning and things wee normal and all happy to see each other. Friday was spent together running a few errands and then in the pool in the afternoon having a few ****tails. everything was really nice and relaxing. One of our neighbours popped round without his wife so hubby is like "where is she" and goes to visit. Our eldest goes too which happens often.
Anyway D comes homes and says that dad is complaining to friend that can make his own decisions, do what he wants, feels like a stranger in his own home, etc. I was a bit shocked by this but said I would speak to him. H comes home and I calmly asked what he was talking about and that if there were any problems why didnt he tell me. That when he kicked off. Shouting at me, saying that I told him to leave (which I never have), being really aggressive and angry toward our daughter.
He came to bed but got up about 30 mins later and slammed the bedroom door. I followed and asked him why he was outside (with a beer) and was told "I am going to kick her out the house". Calmly again I said that she told me as she was worried why he was being like this. I got no answer and left him outside. He fell asleep out there and came to bed during the night.
Today I feel so angry and hurt and , right or wrong, I have hardly spoken to him. He took our youngest D out for awhile and for lunch but he has not spoken or even looked at our eldest. He has also spent the last 9 1/2 hours outside by himself drinking beer, only coming in to use the toilet.
I am so confused. He says he struggles to fit in but makes no or little effort. He drinks 10 - 15 beers every night when home (cant drink at work which he constantly tells me). The kids keep asking him to not drink so much so they can do stuff but he digs his heels in and refuses. "Your not telling me what to do" When I try to start a conversation about stuff he gets angry, aggressive and tries to intimidate, esp the kids. Our eldest D has disliked him for months now but he doesnt feel he needs to try to mend bridges and expects her or us to make the first move to apologise.
Does he want to try, doesnt know how to try, or is just a child? I really dont know anymore.
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