Hi everyone! Just found this forum today and it is nice to see im not alone. Im hoping to gain some insight into my marriage problems and hope I might be able to help some of you with yours.
Me and him have been together for 9 years, married for 4.5 we also have 2 kids together.
Im here because I find it extremely difficult to bring these issues up with my husband. He isn't a "feelings" kind of guy. There is no romance. I feel like a roommate. He does not seem to desire me anymore :(
every 6 months or so I have a melt down because I just cant bottle it up any more. We hash things out and he reassures me that he loves me. He tries a little harder to show me affection for a few days and then back to the same old.
Recently I decided to check his browser history for some good reads while I sipped my coffee (he is a news junkie) and I found a few pics of naked girls. This was a total shocker because he always tells me how disgusted he is with that kind of stuff. He also frequents a conspiracy forum and the thread titles he clicks on half the time don't even have to do with what the site is about. There was a woman with a sexy picture who posted a thread about "oh im drinking a lot right now because im so alone" he replies to her with "what you drinkin"
I know I may be over reacting and snooping is not good, I should trust him.. but the more I snoop.. the more I feel like I don't even know him. Im afraid he is just putting up with me because of the kids. he is constantly on the computer 'checking out the news' and I cant shake this feeling that he is hiding something.
I did some research on insecurity yesterday and it seems I have "anxious attachment". Thinking about getting some councelling. I feel so worthless, my own husband dosent want to be close with me. I want to cry constantly!!!
What can I do when I want closeness and he never does?? is this normal in a marriage? he blames his lack of libido on his age (42). While I feel at my prime. I need to feel wanted, even lusted after sometimes.
anyways im rambling now.. thanks for taking the time to read this. Id really appreciate any feedback. :)
Me and him have been together for 9 years, married for 4.5 we also have 2 kids together.
Im here because I find it extremely difficult to bring these issues up with my husband. He isn't a "feelings" kind of guy. There is no romance. I feel like a roommate. He does not seem to desire me anymore :(
every 6 months or so I have a melt down because I just cant bottle it up any more. We hash things out and he reassures me that he loves me. He tries a little harder to show me affection for a few days and then back to the same old.
Recently I decided to check his browser history for some good reads while I sipped my coffee (he is a news junkie) and I found a few pics of naked girls. This was a total shocker because he always tells me how disgusted he is with that kind of stuff. He also frequents a conspiracy forum and the thread titles he clicks on half the time don't even have to do with what the site is about. There was a woman with a sexy picture who posted a thread about "oh im drinking a lot right now because im so alone" he replies to her with "what you drinkin"
I know I may be over reacting and snooping is not good, I should trust him.. but the more I snoop.. the more I feel like I don't even know him. Im afraid he is just putting up with me because of the kids. he is constantly on the computer 'checking out the news' and I cant shake this feeling that he is hiding something.
I did some research on insecurity yesterday and it seems I have "anxious attachment". Thinking about getting some councelling. I feel so worthless, my own husband dosent want to be close with me. I want to cry constantly!!!
What can I do when I want closeness and he never does?? is this normal in a marriage? he blames his lack of libido on his age (42). While I feel at my prime. I need to feel wanted, even lusted after sometimes.
anyways im rambling now.. thanks for taking the time to read this. Id really appreciate any feedback. :)
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