I read a few posts before starting this one on the same topic. Figure I would tell my story. I first realized that porn was an issue many years ago and then we went through a phase where strip clubs were an issue. We hit a boiling point and divorce was a hot issue and then I found out I was pregnant with our first child and took it as a sign that we were meant to stay together and he seemed to redevote himself to us. Well eight years later it turns out he has had about 50 encounters with escorts over all these years. The most he claims to have seen the same one is 3 times because he didn't want a connection. I found proof in late October but before that in July we started seeing a counselor who told him he was a sec addict based on his issues with online porn. When I found proof all I knew was it had been going on for 4 years and he admitted to the rest and the next day got himself a sex addiction counselor. As part of that he has been told to joi n Sex Addictions Annonomus. He has called in and is working on a book. Yes I got tested for STDs and it was fine. I am working on finding myself some support. I wish I would say I don't love him and I haven't prayed to stop but I do. Ever since all this came out I feel like I had my husband back in some ways but I feel like I am going crazy. One day it is almost like nothing happened and the next I am so buried in sadness and anger that I find it hard to function. We have 2 girls, 8 and 4 and they got wind of serious problems but don't know what is going on and were a mess. Who is going to have to leave and tears were found and it tore me to pieces. He also telling me it had nothing to do with me and everything to do with him and his seeking help.....I don't know. Add to this I am legally blind and have no job it is a hard decision to deal with. I talked to a lawyer to make sure he couldn't take my kids away because I was blind and he can't and he would have to gi ve me 20 percent of his earning for my life because I am disabled and on top of that child support. I am taking it a day at a time but it is so hard. I feel stupid and lost. Looking into support groups and reaching out here. I told him in front of his sec addiction counselor that I don't know that I am staying but I know that if he does it again we are done. Any advise from those living it or have done what he did would be helpful. I would lovee to know if it is possible that he could be love and committed to me and this be a separate issue. We have been together 15 year and married 13 on the 5th.
Put the internet to work for you.
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