Looking for advice and perspective. My wife and I have different opinions on my MIL. My wife and I have been married for 22 years (together for 25yrs). We are in our mid - late 40's. We have 2 girls age 9 and 12y/o. We live in a very small 2 bed / 2 bath home.
My MIL lives 35 minutes away. She visits and spends the night at our home approximately 3 - 4 days (inc nights) per week. This has been going on for about 7 years. My MIL is 67 y/o, single (divorced for 40 years), no boyfriend for the last 15 years and she is very healthy.
I have to say I've had enough of my MIL being around so much. We live in a small home and I feel very intruded upon at times. When my wife and I are dealing with discipline issues with our daughters my MIL will interject her opinion that opposes our direction. My MIL over all is a fairly nice person but has no concept of boundaries.
I have (nicely) talked with my MIL about not offering opinions during family disputes. These talks have not been received well by my MIL and my wife.
I have talked with my wife about my feelings of being intruded upon by her mother and to have her mothers overnight visits reduced and stopped. this has not been received well either.
I have been marked "the bad guy" by my wife and MIL. I am feeling so intruded upon in my own home when my MIL is around.
Intimate one on one time with my wife doesn't happen when my MIL is around. I have to be careful what I talk about when my MIL is over because she will invite herself in to the conversation between my wife and I. I have to change how I normally live in my home.
Last week I talked with my wife about how I feel and that we need to work on a solution. I was basically shut down and told there is no problem having my MIL around as much as she is and I should not have an issue.
This has been going on too long for me. This is causing my wife an I to become distant. I am so frustrated at this point!
Is there something wrong with me feeling like this and not wanting my MIL around as much as she is?
My MIL lives 35 minutes away. She visits and spends the night at our home approximately 3 - 4 days (inc nights) per week. This has been going on for about 7 years. My MIL is 67 y/o, single (divorced for 40 years), no boyfriend for the last 15 years and she is very healthy.
I have to say I've had enough of my MIL being around so much. We live in a small home and I feel very intruded upon at times. When my wife and I are dealing with discipline issues with our daughters my MIL will interject her opinion that opposes our direction. My MIL over all is a fairly nice person but has no concept of boundaries.
I have (nicely) talked with my MIL about not offering opinions during family disputes. These talks have not been received well by my MIL and my wife.
I have talked with my wife about my feelings of being intruded upon by her mother and to have her mothers overnight visits reduced and stopped. this has not been received well either.
I have been marked "the bad guy" by my wife and MIL. I am feeling so intruded upon in my own home when my MIL is around.
Intimate one on one time with my wife doesn't happen when my MIL is around. I have to be careful what I talk about when my MIL is over because she will invite herself in to the conversation between my wife and I. I have to change how I normally live in my home.
Last week I talked with my wife about how I feel and that we need to work on a solution. I was basically shut down and told there is no problem having my MIL around as much as she is and I should not have an issue.
This has been going on too long for me. This is causing my wife an I to become distant. I am so frustrated at this point!
Is there something wrong with me feeling like this and not wanting my MIL around as much as she is?
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