My girlfriend of months (since april-may) has just recently said she loves me, in a drunken text last night (followed by a longer spiel text in the style of 'let me count the ways' sort of sentimentality).
Eep.
What do I do, TSR?
On the one hand I like her a lot, enjoy being with her, care about her, etc. I am generally not great at being around someone for extended periods of time or sleeping with them in the same bed, but I can be around her no worries. I don't want to break up.
On the other hand I feel like I am leading her on and being insanely unfair by not saying it back? I don't want to tell her I love her when I don't but I can't predict whether I will or not in the future, that is something that takes time and also I'm pretty protective of my feelings that way anyhow.
It's possible I might never feel comfortable and safe enough to let myself feel 'love' let alone speak it aloud? Is it fair to carry on a relationship when one person is 'in love' and out with it while the other doesn't even know if they'll ever be there.
Honestly I wish she had never said it, and all I can think of doing right now is being straight up honest and telling her that while I do like and care for her I'm not ready to say that, or just laugh it off as drunken shenanigans.
I was happier being an actions-louder-than-words couple. A couple that didn't need to throw around that over-used over-abused meaningless set of syllables.
Eep.
What do I do, TSR?
On the one hand I like her a lot, enjoy being with her, care about her, etc. I am generally not great at being around someone for extended periods of time or sleeping with them in the same bed, but I can be around her no worries. I don't want to break up.
On the other hand I feel like I am leading her on and being insanely unfair by not saying it back? I don't want to tell her I love her when I don't but I can't predict whether I will or not in the future, that is something that takes time and also I'm pretty protective of my feelings that way anyhow.
It's possible I might never feel comfortable and safe enough to let myself feel 'love' let alone speak it aloud? Is it fair to carry on a relationship when one person is 'in love' and out with it while the other doesn't even know if they'll ever be there.
Honestly I wish she had never said it, and all I can think of doing right now is being straight up honest and telling her that while I do like and care for her I'm not ready to say that, or just laugh it off as drunken shenanigans.
I was happier being an actions-louder-than-words couple. A couple that didn't need to throw around that over-used over-abused meaningless set of syllables.
Put the internet to work for you.
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