Hi
Right this is the first time I have ever used a forum so please do go easy on me :-)
Right I have been with my H for 13 years now and we seem to be going through a rough patch regarding sex. We have 2 young children and the usual life type things get in the way however we are both working really hard at making things work and to make time for each other. However I have a couple of things that I need to get other people opinions on as I am getting fed up of being constantly told "all men do it" and "you should be okay with it" when I am just not so sure that is the case. So like I said please be gentle on me as this is something that I just need some honest advice on. Right so here goes:
Issue 1 - My H keeps constantly getting messages from one particular male friend that are of varying forms of sexual nature. The could be videos, messages or pictures. When I say constantly I mean daily messages. The most recent one was of a man and woman dancing pratically naked together inclining they are going to have sex with someone else filming it. My issue with this is that it feels too close to home. Is that wrong of me to feel this way? Yes my H watches porn and I get that and understand that and sometimes parttake in that but to me porn is porn whereas these messages are different. When I asked my husband who was in the message and where is came from he fobbed it off and said I should be okay with it. Should I be? I just do not know anymore?
Issue 2 - One evening H and I were hinting that we were going to have sex but just needed to finish what each of us were doing. Once we have done that we were sat together and I felt cold so snuggled into him. With the warmth of him I dozed of for all of 10 mins which really wound him up and made him angry. When I woke I was wide awake and ready for sex but by this time he was too annoyed with me so we left it and I went to bed. However a couple of hours later when he had calmed down and decided he still wanted sex he woke me up and proceed to have sex with me. I didn't mind as I wanted to satisfy his needs but felt it to be completely unfair that he could get annoyed with me and not want to bother having sex for him to then just wake me up when it suited him to satisfy his own disires whereas had we done it earlier in the evening we both would've been satisfied. Am I right or wrong for feeling this?
Thanks in advance guys :-)
Right this is the first time I have ever used a forum so please do go easy on me :-)
Right I have been with my H for 13 years now and we seem to be going through a rough patch regarding sex. We have 2 young children and the usual life type things get in the way however we are both working really hard at making things work and to make time for each other. However I have a couple of things that I need to get other people opinions on as I am getting fed up of being constantly told "all men do it" and "you should be okay with it" when I am just not so sure that is the case. So like I said please be gentle on me as this is something that I just need some honest advice on. Right so here goes:
Issue 1 - My H keeps constantly getting messages from one particular male friend that are of varying forms of sexual nature. The could be videos, messages or pictures. When I say constantly I mean daily messages. The most recent one was of a man and woman dancing pratically naked together inclining they are going to have sex with someone else filming it. My issue with this is that it feels too close to home. Is that wrong of me to feel this way? Yes my H watches porn and I get that and understand that and sometimes parttake in that but to me porn is porn whereas these messages are different. When I asked my husband who was in the message and where is came from he fobbed it off and said I should be okay with it. Should I be? I just do not know anymore?
Issue 2 - One evening H and I were hinting that we were going to have sex but just needed to finish what each of us were doing. Once we have done that we were sat together and I felt cold so snuggled into him. With the warmth of him I dozed of for all of 10 mins which really wound him up and made him angry. When I woke I was wide awake and ready for sex but by this time he was too annoyed with me so we left it and I went to bed. However a couple of hours later when he had calmed down and decided he still wanted sex he woke me up and proceed to have sex with me. I didn't mind as I wanted to satisfy his needs but felt it to be completely unfair that he could get annoyed with me and not want to bother having sex for him to then just wake me up when it suited him to satisfy his own disires whereas had we done it earlier in the evening we both would've been satisfied. Am I right or wrong for feeling this?
Thanks in advance guys :-)
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