Well, I posted here about 2 months back about not liking my ex-gf of 3 year's kids. Ended relationship.
Fast forward about 6-8 weeks. . .she emails me last night wanting closure, thinking about sex with you, etc.
Here's the thing, and I'd like some women here with some HONEST answers.
One of the things that hurt me was and I was unable to compromise on is she didn't want to move into my "crappy house." (it is admittedly crappy in spots, kitchen in particular). And at 46 years old, I don't want to remortgage and go house hunting like a couple of wide-eyed 20 somethings.
I guess I am angry at her. . .her circumstance:
A. She was in a marriage with domestic violence
B. She went bankrupt shortly after
C. She has a modest job.
D. She has a kid with a chronic, recurring bone disease.
E. The kids father is minimally involved as a parent.
You would think her values would be on health and other less materialistic things.
I think of the Chris Rock routine:
http://ift.tt/1xb4SkV
(it's raunchy so just a disclosure).
"Even the best woman cannot go backwards in lifestyle. Can't do it." And that's just it, other than that. . .she WAS the best woman. Really a good woman. I mean that.
Her father set her up nicely after the divorce in a nice townhouse (he owns, she pays rent) and moving in with me is a "step backwards." I know that. Nice amenities are sparse to non-existent at my place.
I try to get it, but I guess women, can you help me out here a bit? Why does a nice kitchen, and carpets, and decorations mean so much you would turn away a guy for, who was pretty good on all other dimensions? It can't be just the material things themselves - is it the prestige things carry with it?
I'm literally blown away because I did think she was different than my ex-wife, who pretty much thought she was owed a lifestyle and when we didnt' get it, resentment and anger set in.
This is all separate from the other issue of not caring for her kids. I guess trying to get some closure myself. . .vs. just not dealing with it. I wished her well.
Fast forward about 6-8 weeks. . .she emails me last night wanting closure, thinking about sex with you, etc.
Here's the thing, and I'd like some women here with some HONEST answers.
One of the things that hurt me was and I was unable to compromise on is she didn't want to move into my "crappy house." (it is admittedly crappy in spots, kitchen in particular). And at 46 years old, I don't want to remortgage and go house hunting like a couple of wide-eyed 20 somethings.
I guess I am angry at her. . .her circumstance:
A. She was in a marriage with domestic violence
B. She went bankrupt shortly after
C. She has a modest job.
D. She has a kid with a chronic, recurring bone disease.
E. The kids father is minimally involved as a parent.
You would think her values would be on health and other less materialistic things.
I think of the Chris Rock routine:
http://ift.tt/1xb4SkV
(it's raunchy so just a disclosure).
"Even the best woman cannot go backwards in lifestyle. Can't do it." And that's just it, other than that. . .she WAS the best woman. Really a good woman. I mean that.
Her father set her up nicely after the divorce in a nice townhouse (he owns, she pays rent) and moving in with me is a "step backwards." I know that. Nice amenities are sparse to non-existent at my place.
I try to get it, but I guess women, can you help me out here a bit? Why does a nice kitchen, and carpets, and decorations mean so much you would turn away a guy for, who was pretty good on all other dimensions? It can't be just the material things themselves - is it the prestige things carry with it?
I'm literally blown away because I did think she was different than my ex-wife, who pretty much thought she was owed a lifestyle and when we didnt' get it, resentment and anger set in.
This is all separate from the other issue of not caring for her kids. I guess trying to get some closure myself. . .vs. just not dealing with it. I wished her well.
Put the internet to work for you.
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