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When you have had enough let it out. A forum style blog about relationship issues and concerns,join in and have your say.
Asking someone out even though you know your chances are slim ? Bad Idea ?
So there's this woman and she works in my opticians , I first met her about a month or two back where she helped me choose some glasses and I was drawn to her very quickly . She's gorgeous , very friendly and has a genuinely warm personality , she also has the most delightful french accent as she's Algerian.
I tried not to get too attached because I knew the chances of her liking me of something ever happening where quite slim . I'd put her at around 20ish , she works full time in specsavers as a consultant , we come from different background , i doubt she finds me attractive etc whereas i'm 18 thought I look atleast 21 , Im a student who lives with his mum etc
In recent weeks i've had to pop in and out of the shop to sort out my lenses and i've really gotten infatuated with her . I tried giving her the cold shoulder at first but her personality is so forthcoming that its hard to . I flirt with her quite lightly , as in compliments etc and she responds well . I know that being nice is part of her job and all so thats what I have to keep telling myself to not be overwhelmed by it all .
Today I went in to pick up my lenses and basically itd be the last time I see her for god knows how long because from here on they'll be delivered to my house . I did plan on telling her how gorgeous I think she is and possibly asking her for a drink sometime but it didn't go to plan and ended up just leaving the store with my lenses telling her to have a nice day .
Now im kicking myself I didn't do something because im the type who cant take regret but there's a part of me which thinks nothing would have came of it anyway , the regret is killing me though .
On the way home whilst brooding over how much a pussy I am , I toyed with the thought of phoning up , asking for her and telling her but I know it would probably not go to plan and end up incredibly cringey
Anyone been in a similar situation ? I really need to get her out my head.
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being "friends"
ok so basically this guy and i were like best friends and then i, very very stupidly, started liking him, and given our closeness and the extent to which we were comfortable with each other we would flirt a bit but not much, but we were really close to the point that many people and friends of mine and friends we have in common mistook his friendliness as a reciprocation of my feelings... nevermind thing is, being a very hopeful person i slowly let others convince me he liked me too and in the end i told him i liked him as you can guess from my negativity, things didnt work out but he said we could still b friends and i deifnitely wanted to (especially cuz after all we've been through i still love him as a firned and i knew it wasnt gonna be awkward for either of us) but despiete everything, we were never as closethen **** happened, nothing special i dont think, but just when i thought we were starting to get close again the summer started and i left for the entir e summer and though i wrote him once or twice we didnt really keep i touch or talk (this didnt worry me cuz im just that kind of person) so i figured when id get back things would be goodproblem is right now things are even worse, when i got back from vacation and came to school late he didnt even say hi and ignored me for the first few days, in this past entire month i havent even had a conversation with him, not once, i can literally count that he gave me 1 hug and said hi to me literally 3 times in the entire month, we dont even look at each other in the hallwaysand i hate it soo much i feel like jumping off a building, i mean not really but i soo hate it, i cant stand it at all, it's horrible, and all the attemps i make to get close to him fail (not that i make many...) thing is i really dont know what to do, all of the friends we had in common moved so now we hang out with different people and different crowds which makes things even harder and omg please help me!! how can i get close to him again? pleasee :(:(:( like really, now he hangs out with new people and hes interested in new things and im pretty sure hes not interested in mataining a frienship with me but this means so much to me please help me :(
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Why are women obsessed with relationships?
They love relationship movies, shows, books, mags. Not just romance, but any kind of relationship. Take out the romance part out of all these retarded vampire stories and girls wouldn't touch them with a 6 foot chisel. They can talk for hours about who their friends or their ''fav celebs'' are dating , ****ing, marrying, divorcing, fancying, who is pregnant , who had a baby ...
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What are the chances ?!
For a guy (age 23) who doesn't know how to kiss learn how to kiss / french kiss without getting rejected or friend zoned by girls after the first kiss?
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Over controlling parents
I'm in need for some advice....
I'm 24 years old, went to university abroad in the UK. When I decided to go to uni abroad, it was a massive argument with my parents, and I thought once I'd finished university I'd be a free man.
I'm currently looking for a job in the UK and my parents actively do everything in their power in order to manipulate me not to work in the UK. They want me to stay in my home country, live with them and they want to get me a job back home. They want to control my life, they never liked any of my girlfriends, particularly my mum. She used to call my previous girlfriend fat when she wasn't. (My mum is perfect in her oown eyes).
With my current girlfriend, whom I intend to marry, I secretely checked my mum's messages and emails on her phone (I recognise I shouldnt have invaded her privacy, but I had good reason to), and I saw her bitching about my girlfriend to literally all her girlfriends. She called my girlfriend crazy, psycopath, bitch and she wasn't good for me. Then I saw another email in which she was trying to hook me up with the daughter of one of her friends who is the same age as me. A while ago, I received a call from my mum's friend who invited me out to dinner (saying that her daughter could get me an interview). I can't believe my mum's friends are also trying to manipulate me, seriously, a girl my age will get me a job interview???
I've had several conversations with my mum but she never listens, she calls and will always call me her baby in public and grab my hand when crossing the road- I am 2 4years old, not 5. She does everything she can so that I don't get a job in the UK and obliges me to come back home for a week ever month- she always manages this via emotional manipulation. I saw in one of her emails she said to my dad : "We should oblige him to come home for a week in July, otherwise I'm going to go and force him to come back home". There is always a pattern: FEAR, Lies, Obligation, and guilt.
My parents tell me not to get married before 35 years old, because people who get married before that age are abnormal and low-class. They tell me fat people are monsters and recently made fun of a poor nurse who had crossed eyes- very judgmental. They themselves got married really late (i have 40 years difference with my dad), and I know they will never be happy with any of my chcoices- for example the day I marry my girlfriend there will be huge arguments.
I'm temporarily at home now before going back to the UK, and they've told me you're not going back to the UK (my girlfriend is waiting for me in the UK, we've got housing together, and my future career lies in the UK). My mum controls everything, even the haircut, when I was small she forbid me to cut my hair short, and forced me to wear fluo clothes at school. I'm 24 years old and nothing has changed. I'm in depression now because it feels like my whole life has been planned for me, live to please other people, and the minute I focus on myself I get called selfish.
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hair falls out every time i touch it
everytime i run my hands through my hair, attest 7/8 hairs fall out.
i have relatively thick curly long hair
this doesn't happen as much for the first 2 days after washing it, but after that it falls out more and more. when i wash it though there is a poooool of hair, and when i brush it the brush fills up ridiculous amounts
i only brush my hair once i wash it, so it could be I'm not brushing the tangles out so when i brush my fingers through my hair it seems a lot more than it is as its accumulated?
just wanted to know is this normal and do other girls have the same issue?
I'm getting paranoid about it because i feel like my hair is falling out faster than its being replaced, but i know your meant to loose 100 hairs a day or so.
could the birth control pill have any contribution to this either? i asked my doctor and she said she's never heard of it, some girls complain of thinning though.
my mums hair fell out after child birth and stress so it could be hereditary too.
any other girls out there have a lot of hair fall?
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did I screw up in front of my crush?
So me and my friend were walking towards a flight of stairs and then I saw my crush coming from the other direction. We are heading up and he is heading down. Anyway I saw him (and I think he saw us) then i got so nervous so I looked down. About 5 seconds later my friend saw him then she gave me a look kinda like teasing me. Anyway when I walked pass him, I didn't look at him I just stare down urghhh (I don't know why!!!! Feel like shooting myself now) and I think my pretttttyyy friend smiled at him.I feel like such a loser :( why can't I just be more confident ugh.
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Getting him to initiate sex again
So me and my partner had our ups and downs. That's why I joined this site, to find out some things. Has been quite interesting. He stopped initiating sex so after being on here, I decided to try harder on my side and started doing it more often hoping it would kick start him again. That didn't work, I never got turned down but he still didn't try. So I spoke to him about it and he said it's because I would "always" turn him down. I agreed because he has the worst timing, but told him if he chose better timing I would stop saying no. However our body clocks are on completely different times.
He stays up until around 2 am, making him not wake up until lunch time. Unless he has work on of course, but still he doesn't come to bed earlier. I have to be up with the kids by 7 am and then in bed much earlier then him.
I even tried staying up later in hope he would start initiating more when the boys were asleep, however that never worked because that's his gaming time.
We are at the point now that the only time we have sex is if I get bored and wake him up early (normally 10 or 11 am) and take it. However I'm sooo sick of his morning breath, I want him when I can kiss him without being grossed out. I make the effort though and pretend it doesn't bother me.
However because we only have sex like once a month or once a fortnight if lucky, he doesn't last long and that upsets him. I tell him we should do it more often and he would last longer.
I'm just need to k ow if there is a subtle way to remind him to try harder? Like... I can talk til I'm blue in the face but he just believes that "I'm ready for it whenever you are" is good enough but I want some romance. We do have foreplay but by the time I actually want sex with him, I'm not interested in drawing it out.
I don't know. I'm rambling. Just want advice on how to get him to start trying again...
He stays up until around 2 am, making him not wake up until lunch time. Unless he has work on of course, but still he doesn't come to bed earlier. I have to be up with the kids by 7 am and then in bed much earlier then him.
I even tried staying up later in hope he would start initiating more when the boys were asleep, however that never worked because that's his gaming time.
We are at the point now that the only time we have sex is if I get bored and wake him up early (normally 10 or 11 am) and take it. However I'm sooo sick of his morning breath, I want him when I can kiss him without being grossed out. I make the effort though and pretend it doesn't bother me.
However because we only have sex like once a month or once a fortnight if lucky, he doesn't last long and that upsets him. I tell him we should do it more often and he would last longer.
I'm just need to k ow if there is a subtle way to remind him to try harder? Like... I can talk til I'm blue in the face but he just believes that "I'm ready for it whenever you are" is good enough but I want some romance. We do have foreplay but by the time I actually want sex with him, I'm not interested in drawing it out.
I don't know. I'm rambling. Just want advice on how to get him to start trying again...
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Newbie Question for LD Women...
Been browsing this site for a few months. I won't go into lengthy details as they are the same as many people on here. The basics are:
I'm HD man married to LD woman. Been through all of the emotions others have lamented about. Have considered all of the options one would consider when feeling that kind of anger, resentment, rejection, shame for 6 plus years.
SO, my question(s) for LD women. Was your husband ever able to get through to you how horrible you made him feel? If so, how was he able to create this epiphany and were you able to work things out? If not, where are you now?
I realize everyone's situation has variables and the husband plays a significant role in this. But if you were telling your male friend whom you believe has tried to make all the changes requested of an LD wife (be more affectionate outside of sex, be more present, be interested in my concerns/life/needs, etc..) what advise would you give for a final hail mary before throwing in the towel?
I'm HD man married to LD woman. Been through all of the emotions others have lamented about. Have considered all of the options one would consider when feeling that kind of anger, resentment, rejection, shame for 6 plus years.
SO, my question(s) for LD women. Was your husband ever able to get through to you how horrible you made him feel? If so, how was he able to create this epiphany and were you able to work things out? If not, where are you now?
I realize everyone's situation has variables and the husband plays a significant role in this. But if you were telling your male friend whom you believe has tried to make all the changes requested of an LD wife (be more affectionate outside of sex, be more present, be interested in my concerns/life/needs, etc..) what advise would you give for a final hail mary before throwing in the towel?
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To leave or hurt and stay
So, i'm 24 years old have been with my husband for 8 years married for 5..
I guess you could say ive fallen out of love with him.. theres no attraction and no feeling of love anymore.. yerh i love him and care for him but im not in love with him and it feels like this isnt right anymore and most of the time im numb to emotions.
So last year i decided to leave i told him that ive fallen out of love and i dont want to hurt him so we split... in this talk i watched his heart break right in front of me and in return that broke mine right along beside him..
I then lived by myself for a week and cried every day and had nobody around me.. soo yep we ended up getting back together and i got that feeling of ''Love'' back again... at least for a few months..
Its now like a yr and a half later and im depressed due to the fact im not happy where i am but also dont want to hurt him again but am hurting myself while staying here..
I know my parents would support me and my family and friends as they were there last time... i just dont want to deal with his pain...
I guess you could say ive fallen out of love with him.. theres no attraction and no feeling of love anymore.. yerh i love him and care for him but im not in love with him and it feels like this isnt right anymore and most of the time im numb to emotions.
So last year i decided to leave i told him that ive fallen out of love and i dont want to hurt him so we split... in this talk i watched his heart break right in front of me and in return that broke mine right along beside him..
I then lived by myself for a week and cried every day and had nobody around me.. soo yep we ended up getting back together and i got that feeling of ''Love'' back again... at least for a few months..
Its now like a yr and a half later and im depressed due to the fact im not happy where i am but also dont want to hurt him again but am hurting myself while staying here..
I know my parents would support me and my family and friends as they were there last time... i just dont want to deal with his pain...
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Question for the ladies
I've only ever dated two girls, and both times I asked them out via text late at night in a very confession like manner. So I'm left to ponder (now that I'm single again, qq), what is your preferred way to be asked out? Do you like an open and in personal confession? Maybe for it to start with a friendly date, then go from there? Anything else?
Honestly just curious.
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Soooo
My wife and I were in the office the other day and out of the blue she say's " I think about sex as much as I think about my toenails"
I pondered this profound statement for a moment and said
IF it floats,flies or ****s-Rent it!
I pondered this profound statement for a moment and said
IF it floats,flies or ****s-Rent it!
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New Here.. Failing Marriage
I got married when I was 20, almost 3 years ago. Last year, on Halloween, my husband decided to tell me he didn't love me anymore. He was also having a relationship with a coworker that I had been begging him to stop texting for months because she would make "jokes" about him coming over to help her with things. Anyway, my husband moved out for 2 months, and I begged him to come back. After I found out about the affair, I started to give up. I reached out to old friends, I was getting my appetite back, and not crying as much. I even went to counseling on my own. Right before our anniversary, he decided he wanted to work things out with me. I was skeptical, but my marriage meant a lot to me and I take my vows seriously. So I agreed to try and work things out.
Soon after he came home (like literally a week or so), I got pregnant. We had our daughter early, and after we brought her home from the NICU, things with my husband really started to bother me. He doesn't help me out very much, and I realized that, since I became pregnant, we never really worked through our issues. Now I'm having trouble believing I can be happy in this marriage anymore. I hate feeling that way, because I want my daughter to have her parents together, but I also want her to follow whatever makes her happy in life, and I don't know how I can expect that if I don't even do it. I have talked to my husband about this, but I don't know what to expect because we're having the same fights we've been having for years. I have no idea what to do. I need to find myself again. I just don't know if he's willing to really make the changes to make it work this time. Anyone felt this way before?
Soon after he came home (like literally a week or so), I got pregnant. We had our daughter early, and after we brought her home from the NICU, things with my husband really started to bother me. He doesn't help me out very much, and I realized that, since I became pregnant, we never really worked through our issues. Now I'm having trouble believing I can be happy in this marriage anymore. I hate feeling that way, because I want my daughter to have her parents together, but I also want her to follow whatever makes her happy in life, and I don't know how I can expect that if I don't even do it. I have talked to my husband about this, but I don't know what to expect because we're having the same fights we've been having for years. I have no idea what to do. I need to find myself again. I just don't know if he's willing to really make the changes to make it work this time. Anyone felt this way before?
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My wife left me not sure what to think
OK I am on my cell phone so I'm going to make this short and simple. I posted here about 2 years ago. Back in Nov of 2012 my wife told me she was leaving me. She never moved out and I was able to win her back but the changes I made weren't permanent I only changed in the ways she wanted for a year or so. So this time it's over the same issues except I also got caught lying. I am an amateur bodybuilder and used steroids. She told me last time if I ever used them again she said she'd leave a divorce me. Well I am a complete idiot and I did. She said that was the last straw. I ended up telling her about it and didn't think it would be a big deal because I wasn't acting any different. A on she told me she was leaving and began packing her things. I told her I wanted her ring back because it was my grandmother's. She left the following morning. Since then we haven't had much contact except when it's about our son. We have a 3 year old. I am currently doing eve rything I can to win my wife back. I'm seeing a counselor and changing myself I am just having such a difficult time. She has been gone for 10 days. She only took all of her personal affects, she left a lot of things like her desk, chair, her knick knacks on her desk. Our bed is her bed as we put mine in the spare bedroom when she moved in. She left her table and chairs and a few other things like a suitcase. So here are my negative signs of things that are telling me it won't work out, she has texted me numerous times and she says things like, you need accept the reality of this, you need to understand I'm done, I have no regrets about leaving, I'm never coming back. She also took half of our savings account and told me to take the other half so she can close it. Also, took the modem and canceled our Internet since it was in her name, texts me about finding new car insurance so we can can ours, switching all my bills to be paid from my own account, and swith my paycheck t o my own account so our joint can be closed.
OK so the positive signs I have that it might work, she didn't pack all her things and has been here numerous times since then and hasn't takin any of it including her sewing machine. Her ring, I asked for it twice because it was my grandmother's so it's sentimental to me. She hasn't brought it or even mentioned it since. I haven't brought it up because I want to save this and want her to keep it as a reminder. Since the day she left she has filed for or even mentioned the word divorce to me. She still has her garage door opener and house keys and whenever she comes over to drop off or pick up our son she just opens the garage door and walks right in.
In my opinion and opinions from a lot of people I work with she's days all of those hurtful things to push my buttons so that I blow up at her which is what she's expecting giving her permission to file cause she wants it and therefore I want it if I reacted like that and she's doing it to hurt me. To make me feel the pain she had felt. I think it's possible but I need to change a lot. I am seeing a counselor and going to church and doing a lot of healing. I stopped the steroids and I am clean. I've told her all of this but she doesn't care. She says it's too late. But she said all that last time. Can I do this? Is it even possible?
OK so the positive signs I have that it might work, she didn't pack all her things and has been here numerous times since then and hasn't takin any of it including her sewing machine. Her ring, I asked for it twice because it was my grandmother's so it's sentimental to me. She hasn't brought it or even mentioned it since. I haven't brought it up because I want to save this and want her to keep it as a reminder. Since the day she left she has filed for or even mentioned the word divorce to me. She still has her garage door opener and house keys and whenever she comes over to drop off or pick up our son she just opens the garage door and walks right in.
In my opinion and opinions from a lot of people I work with she's days all of those hurtful things to push my buttons so that I blow up at her which is what she's expecting giving her permission to file cause she wants it and therefore I want it if I reacted like that and she's doing it to hurt me. To make me feel the pain she had felt. I think it's possible but I need to change a lot. I am seeing a counselor and going to church and doing a lot of healing. I stopped the steroids and I am clean. I've told her all of this but she doesn't care. She says it's too late. But she said all that last time. Can I do this? Is it even possible?
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Just broke up with my girldfriend, I need cheering up
Please? I'm not in a good way, could really use some cheering up / encouragement, good people of TSR
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