I work in an office environment and over the last few months have grown close to a male colleague. There is a bit of an age gap, I'm 24 and he is 38. I've been at the company for two years and we never paid each other much attention until we had to work on a joint project at started talking. We discovered that we both share a similar sense of humour, think alike, have the same interests and above all have this amazing chemistry that others have picked up on.
At first all of our interactions were work related whereas now we talk on a very personal level. We're both in relationships but he was shocked when he found out that me and boyfriend of 6 years were going through a rough patch, he said I should have told him sooner. I get the sense that he doesn't want to pry but every now and again he can't resist making a comment about how I'm not happy in my relationship and gets some sort of satisfaction from it. He has told me that he doesn't know whether to commit to his current girlfriend (age not being on his side if he wants to start a family) or end the relationship as he is not overly into her. I have made it clear that I want to make it work with my boyfriend.
Despite this, we work in different departments but we always try to find an excuse to go to each other's desks, we both jokingly show dissapointment when one of us books time off work, and he has suggested that we possibly go out for a drink or see a film some time, which although I would love doesn't seem appropriate considering I know that I have feelings for him and I would feel like I would be betraying my boyfriend.
My gut instinct is that he feels the same way, the conversations we have, his body language is engaged, increased use of emoticons and calling be 'babe' in texts recently but then he also gives out mixed messages. He has told me how usually dates younger women but thinks that his current girlfriend is maybe too young for him (she's 29) so why would he be interested in me? Also when he isn't at work, he usually texts me to ask how my day is going and once I said that I was missing him of course and he replied by saying that he was glad to hear I was missing him. Bit of an odd comment but I thought if he did like me that was the perfect opportunity to build on it. Sometimes I think that he likes me but has too much respect to try and hit on me when we're seeing other people, possibly?
I don't want to cheat or end things with my boyfriend but at the same time this man is constantly on my mind and if it wasn't for the age gap or for the fact that I have been with my boyfriend for so long, I couldn't imagine myself with anyone else. I feel like I just need to know how he feels as the uncertainty is becoming unbearable; I don't see how he can't sense it too but neither of us will openly acknowledge it.
He is about to go on holiday for a family wedding so hopefully some time apart will some good. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice is much appreciated. :)
At first all of our interactions were work related whereas now we talk on a very personal level. We're both in relationships but he was shocked when he found out that me and boyfriend of 6 years were going through a rough patch, he said I should have told him sooner. I get the sense that he doesn't want to pry but every now and again he can't resist making a comment about how I'm not happy in my relationship and gets some sort of satisfaction from it. He has told me that he doesn't know whether to commit to his current girlfriend (age not being on his side if he wants to start a family) or end the relationship as he is not overly into her. I have made it clear that I want to make it work with my boyfriend.
Despite this, we work in different departments but we always try to find an excuse to go to each other's desks, we both jokingly show dissapointment when one of us books time off work, and he has suggested that we possibly go out for a drink or see a film some time, which although I would love doesn't seem appropriate considering I know that I have feelings for him and I would feel like I would be betraying my boyfriend.
My gut instinct is that he feels the same way, the conversations we have, his body language is engaged, increased use of emoticons and calling be 'babe' in texts recently but then he also gives out mixed messages. He has told me how usually dates younger women but thinks that his current girlfriend is maybe too young for him (she's 29) so why would he be interested in me? Also when he isn't at work, he usually texts me to ask how my day is going and once I said that I was missing him of course and he replied by saying that he was glad to hear I was missing him. Bit of an odd comment but I thought if he did like me that was the perfect opportunity to build on it. Sometimes I think that he likes me but has too much respect to try and hit on me when we're seeing other people, possibly?
I don't want to cheat or end things with my boyfriend but at the same time this man is constantly on my mind and if it wasn't for the age gap or for the fact that I have been with my boyfriend for so long, I couldn't imagine myself with anyone else. I feel like I just need to know how he feels as the uncertainty is becoming unbearable; I don't see how he can't sense it too but neither of us will openly acknowledge it.
He is about to go on holiday for a family wedding so hopefully some time apart will some good. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice is much appreciated. :)
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