So this is my second marriage and in my first one we put our money together, one account no problems, easy to agree on. This time around my new husband was very frugal in the beginning of our relationship, had a lot of savings from years on the road being a roadie, but then his dad was dying from cancer and he switched jobs 2-3 times, blew through his savings and what his dad left him when he did die in January. Just complete breakdown. His new job does not pay well at all so we're struggling bad. I own my own business if that explains anything. i wasn't financially prepared when my first husband left me and really haven't been great with money to begin with. I was so excited when we first got together that he could help me, we'd do better, but then the past 8 months or so has been hellish. He's taken cash I left out that belonged to my business, took my credit cards without asking, and the past few weeks he has barely given me any bill money which is str essing me out! I've tried to be understanding of the stress of his dad dying and plus we paid for our wedding in April too, though I paid for the majority of it. He did buy tons of stuff for our house when he blew through the money so it's not completely selfish. It's just hard that what's his is his and what's mine is his. We each kept our own savings and now have a joint checking but it's still taking adjustment. In his defense, I am a bit of a control freak and I do all the bills plus I suffer from anxiety. It's like neither of us trust the other. He did get screwed over by an ex who took a ton of money from him so I get that. I just wish we could get on and stick to a budget, figure this all out. Just kinda needing to vent. Too embarrassed to tell my friends. Any suggestions, advice, things to try? Thanks ahead of time.
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