How much say do you have over what your spouse buys for the home?
I feel like every time I want something, I get met with a no.
ex.
"I need a food processor"
"No, we don't need one. It's just as easy to cut things and less to clean"
"I'm looking at cabinets to put some stuff in"
"No, we have enough room"
"I'm demoting most of our pots and pans to camping gear. I need new ones, these are warping and scratched"
"No, they are fine"
With every appliance and every home item I want, it's the same thing. It's always an initial no. Sometimes I'll fight it or get it anyway, other times I can't or don't.
Makes me want to just say who the f made you the boss? Actually I did. In our latest argument about the cabinet. Even if I don't listen to him, just the fact that he thinks he can just say no upsets me.
It feels like he is tying to have power and control over me which makes me want to rebel.
But maybe I am reading too much into it. It just feels so disrespectful.
I talked to some female family and basically just got told "eh, that's just men. Just buy whatever you want and don't worry about it"
But it's not so much having the things that is my problem because if I really do want it, I get it anyway and eventually he comes around to the "you were right" speech. It's that he thinks he can say no.
So back to the original question- how much say do you each have? Do you/can you just say no when the other wants to buy something- assuming money isn't an issue?
I feel like every time I want something, I get met with a no.
ex.
"I need a food processor"
"No, we don't need one. It's just as easy to cut things and less to clean"
"I'm looking at cabinets to put some stuff in"
"No, we have enough room"
"I'm demoting most of our pots and pans to camping gear. I need new ones, these are warping and scratched"
"No, they are fine"
With every appliance and every home item I want, it's the same thing. It's always an initial no. Sometimes I'll fight it or get it anyway, other times I can't or don't.
Makes me want to just say who the f made you the boss? Actually I did. In our latest argument about the cabinet. Even if I don't listen to him, just the fact that he thinks he can just say no upsets me.
It feels like he is tying to have power and control over me which makes me want to rebel.
But maybe I am reading too much into it. It just feels so disrespectful.
I talked to some female family and basically just got told "eh, that's just men. Just buy whatever you want and don't worry about it"
But it's not so much having the things that is my problem because if I really do want it, I get it anyway and eventually he comes around to the "you were right" speech. It's that he thinks he can say no.
So back to the original question- how much say do you each have? Do you/can you just say no when the other wants to buy something- assuming money isn't an issue?
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