Long story short, I've been married for 11 years to a woman I've known for 14. We have 2 kids, we both work, and typically we buy what we want (within reason).
We just bought a new house in her hometown. She's had a dream of moving home ever since we met, but our jobs always kept us near one of the major cities here in Texas. Now I work from home and she found a job at a local school district, so we're able to live away from the "big city" and be close to her family.
Of course, a new house means she wants upgrades, which means over $8K in kitchen upgrades right away (countertops, appliances, etc). The house is ridiculously nice as-is, but she considers granite, stainless steel, and decorative backsplash to be "essentials" and I've basically kept my mouth shut.
Here's the issue.. I want an ATV that costs around $6K. I know it's not something I'll use every day but regardless, it's something I've been wanting for hunting season and just riding around on the land behind us. I just don't know how to approach my wife about this. She knows I've been looking but I think if I actually buy this thing, she'll be pretty upset. After we pay for her kitchen remodel, she said she wants to use the rest of our "extra" money to pay off a loan that we owe around $6K on (a loan we took out to pay most of her credit card debt 2 years ago). That won't leave me w/ enough to buy an ATV, but I do understand paying our debts is a good idea before making another large purchase…. Although apparently this doesn't apply to kitchen upgrades.
IDK what to do here… I'm the primary breadwinner, and although she works full time, I bring home nearly twice as much. I feel like after agreeing to all this remodeling (which only benefits her, I could care less what color the countertops or appliances are), I should have the right to buy my ATV, but I also don't feel right about spending another huge sum of money when we have debts to pay off. And I don't want to cause a huge issue by buying this without her consent and asking for forgiveness later.
At the end of the day, I'm just afraid this will build resentment because she's getting her wants NOW while I'll probably have to wait months, maybe years, to get what I want. Any advice??:confused:
We just bought a new house in her hometown. She's had a dream of moving home ever since we met, but our jobs always kept us near one of the major cities here in Texas. Now I work from home and she found a job at a local school district, so we're able to live away from the "big city" and be close to her family.
Of course, a new house means she wants upgrades, which means over $8K in kitchen upgrades right away (countertops, appliances, etc). The house is ridiculously nice as-is, but she considers granite, stainless steel, and decorative backsplash to be "essentials" and I've basically kept my mouth shut.
Here's the issue.. I want an ATV that costs around $6K. I know it's not something I'll use every day but regardless, it's something I've been wanting for hunting season and just riding around on the land behind us. I just don't know how to approach my wife about this. She knows I've been looking but I think if I actually buy this thing, she'll be pretty upset. After we pay for her kitchen remodel, she said she wants to use the rest of our "extra" money to pay off a loan that we owe around $6K on (a loan we took out to pay most of her credit card debt 2 years ago). That won't leave me w/ enough to buy an ATV, but I do understand paying our debts is a good idea before making another large purchase…. Although apparently this doesn't apply to kitchen upgrades.
IDK what to do here… I'm the primary breadwinner, and although she works full time, I bring home nearly twice as much. I feel like after agreeing to all this remodeling (which only benefits her, I could care less what color the countertops or appliances are), I should have the right to buy my ATV, but I also don't feel right about spending another huge sum of money when we have debts to pay off. And I don't want to cause a huge issue by buying this without her consent and asking for forgiveness later.
At the end of the day, I'm just afraid this will build resentment because she's getting her wants NOW while I'll probably have to wait months, maybe years, to get what I want. Any advice??:confused:
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