I've been married 17 years and my 2 children were 4&6 when we got together.. My husband had 2 kids by his 1st wife and 2 by his 2nd wife... Money was tight when we met and he showed me a different life, new furniture, holidays, money for food etc...
My husband had a bit of a temper and could be intimidating but never laid a hand on me..
Over the last few months a few problems have arisen causing me to look back at my life....
I've always 100% supportive of my husband over his kids and difficult ex-wives, so much so my youngest now of 23 yrs old told me his old step brother abused him when they cam to stay when he was about 8 ... I was devastated but did not put a block on my husband seeing or having contact with his son, although my husband was very silent and showed no real emotions over it all.
When my husbands mother died we paid over £2000 to clear her debts and funeral etc.. I have lent his family money never to get it back, yet have never moaned..
My kids all grown up moved out a yr ago, my son had some problems, his car blew made redundant all in one month. He was very depressed and I helped as much as I could, my husband started to moan that I was running about too much for him.
Both my adult children moved back home saying it will be a max of a yr.. They both pay lodgings which helps us out.. But my husband now continuously moans about me doing their washing, giving them lifts basically anything I want to do for them.. If and when I have worked after a long day I have come home to a total mess, previous days washing up, no hoovering etc.. My husbands just says the kids should of helped, yet he does nothing when he does not work, unless it's a project he wants to do.. I have so many u finished jobs around the house, my husband has never put a wash on, only cooks 2 meals which is once in a life time...
I was diagnosed with arthritis approx 1 year ago so some days I am I. Pain, even if he knows I'm in pain he will go to bed and ask what's in his pack up for the following day, he does not make it himself.. On a few occasions I have not made if he has woken me at 5.30 to say it's not in the fridge....
My husband does shout and slamm doors which I have told him it intimidates me..
Everyday it's a new moan like a towel been left on bathroom floor, shower gel standing up on shower base floor, hairs in the sink, kids rooms being messy, kids being noisey.
I can't tell him certain things incase he flares up and starts shouting.
He doesn't want me to work and then says he tells me to do some things and I forget..
It's like walking on egg shells, the more he moans the more I defend my kids and I've told him this. If my kids are in the wrong I will tell them but not in front of him as he seems to get pleasure from it.
So many things are going on I can't put it all down, his own 4 children do not speak to him now over various reasons.
I can't even say he is worse because kids have moved back home as when they moved out he still moaned.
If I suggest paying for a take away for them he refuses, yet the following week I will take the money off them for a take away and he decides he will pay for it ...
I resent him now as he is making me do things by either getting his ok or face a moaning session... Need advice please as I'm 50 now and can't keep this up, I've tried talking to him then it's fine for a little while, then back to normal.
My husband had a bit of a temper and could be intimidating but never laid a hand on me..
Over the last few months a few problems have arisen causing me to look back at my life....
I've always 100% supportive of my husband over his kids and difficult ex-wives, so much so my youngest now of 23 yrs old told me his old step brother abused him when they cam to stay when he was about 8 ... I was devastated but did not put a block on my husband seeing or having contact with his son, although my husband was very silent and showed no real emotions over it all.
When my husbands mother died we paid over £2000 to clear her debts and funeral etc.. I have lent his family money never to get it back, yet have never moaned..
My kids all grown up moved out a yr ago, my son had some problems, his car blew made redundant all in one month. He was very depressed and I helped as much as I could, my husband started to moan that I was running about too much for him.
Both my adult children moved back home saying it will be a max of a yr.. They both pay lodgings which helps us out.. But my husband now continuously moans about me doing their washing, giving them lifts basically anything I want to do for them.. If and when I have worked after a long day I have come home to a total mess, previous days washing up, no hoovering etc.. My husbands just says the kids should of helped, yet he does nothing when he does not work, unless it's a project he wants to do.. I have so many u finished jobs around the house, my husband has never put a wash on, only cooks 2 meals which is once in a life time...
I was diagnosed with arthritis approx 1 year ago so some days I am I. Pain, even if he knows I'm in pain he will go to bed and ask what's in his pack up for the following day, he does not make it himself.. On a few occasions I have not made if he has woken me at 5.30 to say it's not in the fridge....
My husband does shout and slamm doors which I have told him it intimidates me..
Everyday it's a new moan like a towel been left on bathroom floor, shower gel standing up on shower base floor, hairs in the sink, kids rooms being messy, kids being noisey.
I can't tell him certain things incase he flares up and starts shouting.
He doesn't want me to work and then says he tells me to do some things and I forget..
It's like walking on egg shells, the more he moans the more I defend my kids and I've told him this. If my kids are in the wrong I will tell them but not in front of him as he seems to get pleasure from it.
So many things are going on I can't put it all down, his own 4 children do not speak to him now over various reasons.
I can't even say he is worse because kids have moved back home as when they moved out he still moaned.
If I suggest paying for a take away for them he refuses, yet the following week I will take the money off them for a take away and he decides he will pay for it ...
I resent him now as he is making me do things by either getting his ok or face a moaning session... Need advice please as I'm 50 now and can't keep this up, I've tried talking to him then it's fine for a little while, then back to normal.
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