I am married for more than a year. I am Indian. In our culture, bride's family spend most of the money for marriage. Our marriage was no exception. I am liberal in spending money. I am not a lavish spender. I do save money. Have never taken any loan except for House. My wife is opposite in this regard. She thinks a lot before spending money even for necessary expenses (like medical for example).
I have saved considerable amount of money before marriage and I invested it in house along with mortgage. I pay a huge sum of money for home mortgage. All of my wife's savings has gone for marriage expense. Based on my interest, my wife has taken a short term car mortgage. We both are working.
For general home expenses (like groceries, utility bills) we contribute equal share. Mostly I spend for all other expenses like car fuel, gifts, etc. She leads a simple inexpensive life. She buys cheap clothing and always settle with cheaper alternative. I differ from her. Again I am not lavish. MY lifestyle is of an average middle class Indian. My wife donates lot of money to church and to christian organizations. I believe our family expenses, comfort and well-being is more important than charity to church. She strongly disagrees.
Earlier based on my suggestion she opened a recurring deposit as saving. Now she wants to give that savings for her sisters's marriage. I disagreed initially after some though I am realized I am not fair. I told my wife she can help her sister financially for her marriage when the time comes.
This month I spend some money for her expense. Due to some circumstances I ended up paying for it. She promised she will pay me in few days. Latter she payed half and promised the other half next month. I gladly agreed. Now she is telling she can pay only half of the other half the coming month and she is telling she can't pay her half share of next month general expense. My problem is I have huge credit card bill and I couldn't pay for it if she doesn't pay me the money she promised next month. I buy her more gifts than her. I spend more money for her than she spends for me. I don't have any complains. But I do expect her to help me when I am in need. Incidentally the majority of Credit Card purchase were for her. I believe she thinks I spend too much and doesn't agree with me. I never defaulted in any payments so far. I showed my budget for next month and I am short of money, she said she will help paying for Credit Card.
My concern is, she is not keeping her promises. I believe she has enough money to pay the half as she promised; but for some reason she whats the money in Bank. She is not telling me why. I am not comfortable asking about her account balance.
After marriage, I don't spend any of my money for my siblings. Some times I help my parents. They are retired. Also my parents payed me a huge sum of money for initial investment for my house. My wife's parents are still working and they are self-sufficient financially. May be my wife wants to spend money for them. May be she wants to help her sister. Her sister earns less and spends more.
I was giving my full for building the marriage relationship. I feel she is not doing her part when it comes to money. I feel my wife is not supporting me financially. Other aspects of our relation is just great. From today I am not talking to her as usual. If she is not supporting me why should I be kind to her?
She gives more money to church than what she uses for herself. This makes me angry and I wonder is church important than her and me?
I have saved considerable amount of money before marriage and I invested it in house along with mortgage. I pay a huge sum of money for home mortgage. All of my wife's savings has gone for marriage expense. Based on my interest, my wife has taken a short term car mortgage. We both are working.
For general home expenses (like groceries, utility bills) we contribute equal share. Mostly I spend for all other expenses like car fuel, gifts, etc. She leads a simple inexpensive life. She buys cheap clothing and always settle with cheaper alternative. I differ from her. Again I am not lavish. MY lifestyle is of an average middle class Indian. My wife donates lot of money to church and to christian organizations. I believe our family expenses, comfort and well-being is more important than charity to church. She strongly disagrees.
Earlier based on my suggestion she opened a recurring deposit as saving. Now she wants to give that savings for her sisters's marriage. I disagreed initially after some though I am realized I am not fair. I told my wife she can help her sister financially for her marriage when the time comes.
This month I spend some money for her expense. Due to some circumstances I ended up paying for it. She promised she will pay me in few days. Latter she payed half and promised the other half next month. I gladly agreed. Now she is telling she can pay only half of the other half the coming month and she is telling she can't pay her half share of next month general expense. My problem is I have huge credit card bill and I couldn't pay for it if she doesn't pay me the money she promised next month. I buy her more gifts than her. I spend more money for her than she spends for me. I don't have any complains. But I do expect her to help me when I am in need. Incidentally the majority of Credit Card purchase were for her. I believe she thinks I spend too much and doesn't agree with me. I never defaulted in any payments so far. I showed my budget for next month and I am short of money, she said she will help paying for Credit Card.
My concern is, she is not keeping her promises. I believe she has enough money to pay the half as she promised; but for some reason she whats the money in Bank. She is not telling me why. I am not comfortable asking about her account balance.
After marriage, I don't spend any of my money for my siblings. Some times I help my parents. They are retired. Also my parents payed me a huge sum of money for initial investment for my house. My wife's parents are still working and they are self-sufficient financially. May be my wife wants to spend money for them. May be she wants to help her sister. Her sister earns less and spends more.
I was giving my full for building the marriage relationship. I feel she is not doing her part when it comes to money. I feel my wife is not supporting me financially. Other aspects of our relation is just great. From today I am not talking to her as usual. If she is not supporting me why should I be kind to her?
She gives more money to church than what she uses for herself. This makes me angry and I wonder is church important than her and me?
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