Sorry for the long read but I'd really appreciate it if you bothered: When I left school to be home schooled for a year i got rid of my cellphone, Facebook, twitter, instagram etc and contacted my best friend through the house phone. It was fine, I discovered who I was, got rid of peer pressure and I no longer feel the need to fit in at all or live my life trying to be on trend/'beautiful'. I moved countries and schools now and am in england where, let's face it, the trends are everywhere and on everyone and although I don't watch TV anyway, i see ads popping up wherever I go.I hate finding other peoples' judgments on my culture, or body shape or personality habits.The problem is, almost everyone my age(16) is in the loop and even if I build a great relationship with someone it's not real because they're in tune to the 'media world', if i may call it that? As in, aware of everybody's views of bodies, habits, appearance etc and influenced by that.I've foun d out that it affected their image of me and behavior towards me.The relationships are never as raw/natural as my half of it because they have this whole other mentality about society's standards which I've finally managed to get rid of. I'm talking about even friendships.
I'm personally proud of myself because I'm far happier now, and had to go through a great deal of regret and loneliness before coming to terms with this reality. I also matured well, and am interested in philosophy and the traditional arts, which nobody cares to talk about with me. I despise the idea of going back into this 'loop' and trying to keep up with many of the world's useless standards. It also feels like I'm being too nostalgic and trying to live in an era that passed, because these days it's changed so much. Is it me? Am I the one who's trying too hard to be true to myself or do you think media victimization is inevitable? I would love it if i could be around that stuff and not give a damn but i suppose partly to do with my age, it would rub off on me unless I made uncomfortable, conscious efforts.
I'm personally proud of myself because I'm far happier now, and had to go through a great deal of regret and loneliness before coming to terms with this reality. I also matured well, and am interested in philosophy and the traditional arts, which nobody cares to talk about with me. I despise the idea of going back into this 'loop' and trying to keep up with many of the world's useless standards. It also feels like I'm being too nostalgic and trying to live in an era that passed, because these days it's changed so much. Is it me? Am I the one who's trying too hard to be true to myself or do you think media victimization is inevitable? I would love it if i could be around that stuff and not give a damn but i suppose partly to do with my age, it would rub off on me unless I made uncomfortable, conscious efforts.
Put the internet to work for you.
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