| Ok background on us: I'm 33 and my wife is 29. We've been together for about 14 years. We've been married for almost 7 years. we have two kids ages 5 and 2. Last year I had some medical issues, kinda freaked out and started emailing/sending pics in attempts to hook up with strangers (no excuses; just the facts). After about 3-4 months my wife found out and busted me. There was no physical contact made with anyone. She knows all of the details. It made me wake up and realize what I had. I went to some counselling on my own and found some good answers. She almost left me but decided to give MC a shot. It's helped quite a bit I think. We both realized some things about ourselves we didn't know. The issue I have is that we are not having ANY kind of sex. Wife wanted to end MC but the MT told us we should probably wait until we are having sex again. She agreed in office to try various things to work up to sex but so far has not done so. Whenever sex is off the table our relationship is great - we get along, cuddle, kiss and have a good time. Whenever its bedtime and I mention sex or try anything its a big deal typically. Its been 8 months since she found out about the emails and still nothing. It's VERY hard to go that long without sex; I'm about to go crazy. We've always kind of fought about frequency of sex over the years but this is the worst. I'd say typically we would have sex 2 times per month on average. I think she's using sex as a weapon against me. She says she forgives me and I'm being totally upfront when she asks me details but I need love and physical affection. I feel myself withdrawing from her. I'm at the point where I wonder if this will be thrown in my face and used against me for the rest of my life. I'm the sole provider; she stays home with the kids. I love her very much but it's almost making me start to resent her. I don't/want to live in a sexless marriage. I've told her that numerous times in the past. In the past she's even (jokingly?) told me to get a G/F and leave her alone. I'm confused if I want to push the issue and deliver an ultimatum or give it more time or just walk. Not sure if I'm being stupid, selfish or if it's time to move past this issue. Thoughts? Thanks for reading! Men and women's thoughts appreciated! | |||
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When you have had enough let it out. A forum style blog about relationship issues and concerns,join in and have your say.
Am I being stupid?
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