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Re-writing history vs. the truth?

After having read the thread "My wife didn't love me", I started thinking about this.

In my own situation, on D-day, my exb/f told me that he "always thought of us as 'friends-with-benefits" (which frankly, is how we started out...). But he also told me that he loved me during the course of our relationship, and he told me that he was "in love" with me only 10 days before he dropped the bomb that he was having an EA.

His AP also claims that she "never loved" her husband (of 10 years and 2 kids later).

I know that many people who have affairs tend to re-write history. But I also understand that there are people who, for self-serving reasons, REALLY WERE NEVER "IN LOVE" WITH THEIR PARTNER in the first place.

How do you know what the truth is?

Vega




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