flirting through facebook and text

I don't really know where to begin here so I am just going to go for it and hope I don't babble too much... I have been suspicious of my husband since I found out he was texting one of my co-workers friends (weird I know). They had come over during a summer party and he almost instantly "friended" her on facebook... which eventually led to them exchanging numbers and texting. I become more suspicious and jealous always asking what he's doing on his phone, who he is talking to... we fight, we argue, I stay out later after work (I work nights at a resturaunt) he gets mad, I get mad that he's mad because I'm just hanging out with the girls at work. So we start talking a little more calmly to each other and agree to set one day for us to do something together alone, no kids. Oh and sex because I don't give it up enough and that is an issue too. He wants it like when we met when we were 19...maybe I'm not as sexual as he is. Anyway I'm getting sidetracked. We have our 1st date March 20. It was an awesome night. We flirted, we held hands. we smiled, talked. It was great! So he was on his phone and I was watching him, he has a lock on his phone and you KNOW I wanted that dang code!! Well he actually gave it to me. I was shocked. Maybe he really doesn't have anything to hide, I'm thinking. So we get home (kids are at his parents for a sleepover during spring break--even the 2 year old!) and have some of the most fun sex we've had in a long time! I was great, but grew uncomfortable for me so he suggested we grab a beer and go to the bed... Some how we started arguing and he got mad because we stopped, but he sugges ted going to the bed!! I was so confused and he stormed upstairs and went to bed. I went to find out what the hell just happened and he snapped that he had to get up in the morning and it was late. Ok so I'm so mad now and in tears, I go smoke and grab his phone...hey he gave me the code. no texts to look at if there were any (which I know now that there had to have been) but I read several facebook messges to MULTIPLE girls, not just the one I was suspicious of. not all of them were recent some last year, some the year before. I was so shocked! So here I am. Basically the messages were him making comments to these girls 'when we go for a run make sure you wear your thong' 'clothing optional when you come over' you clearly have the features of a runner. Suggestive talk, flirting. I couldn't believe it! One message said 'the warden is here ttyl.' Oh mygoodnesss so many things its crazy. So I ask him about these messages. It's just talk. They don't even reply. You're never home with me always staying at work. about the warden comment he says I meant it in a good way, you know because you take care of everything around here or something like that! WOW! So I contact on of the girls and she says she'll send me the texts (all of them?who knows she could have edited) and one of those is "you wanna know whats funny right now...she's looking over my shoulder asking who you talking to over there...geez it's like jail" What the heck? Why is he bashing me to this chick??!! I feel its bashing, he says its not...I'M SO LOST and CONFUSED!! okay so now this is a zillion miles long. and all I'm looking for is someone to tell me I'm not crazy to want to leave this guy. I am so messed up right now. 3 kids. 11,10, and 2. the 2 year old came about after we split up because of similiar happenings but decided to work things out. Happenings that have been happening in one form or another our whole relationship it seems. Oh my kid are going to be so confused!! Thank you for any thoughts

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