Taken from old Christmas thread.
Hello TSR.
We've broken up, surprise surprise.
I'm heartbroken and crying a lot, it's very painful blah blah.
She let me down in a very nice way after slowly easing off communication during exams. We went out for lunch together yesterday. She told me:
-Our secret relationship was too much stress- as you may know she is a devout Hindu and our relationship would not be approved of by her family. I know this isn't a lie due to the many rules and scriptures I've seen her follow.
She was losing sleep (as well as stress from exams), she felt she'd betrayed her family and religion for too long, she was not ready to stand up to her family, and as much as she loves me, she had to end things now. She told me all this when I first asked her out 9 months ago. Also, it will be much less painful to end now, rather than abruptly when I graduate.
-She doesn't want to be a 'burden' during my final semester of Year 3. She wants me to do great in my degree, go far and be happy.
-She's not 'The One' for me, and wants me to find someone who won't 'weigh you down' with the secrecy element
She made me promise not to give up on life or love.
She also returned all her presents, stating they're 'safer' with me than they were at her house, except for some very personal items which she's kept.
This suggests to me she's not a gold-digger.
I hold onto our secret diary.
We both want to stay friends, because once I graduate I'll probably never see her again. She says we'll hang out, she'll introduce me to her mates, etc.
I am trying my utmost not to knee-jerk her into getting back with me, respecting her wishes.
Unfortunately my paranoia has made me wonder whether she's just "letting me down gently" as we lovely people of Planet Earth do, and actually she's not as innocent and true to her faith as she says. She's hooking up with another guy as we speak (Superman most likely), I'm not the guy for her, she doesn't want to **** up her degree with the stress and doesn't give a rat's ass about how I do (or wishes me well but it's not a big deal where life takes me), etc.
I just saw my counsellor and he actually entertained these notions. He was really cynical about everything I was saying.
Yet he also said for the sake of my sanity it's best to take what she said at face value. So in other words he stuck salt in a sore wound and just made me feel confused as well as hurt...
but maybe I had to hear it.
Your thoughts on this, please. And then I don't think I'm going to want to date anyone for quite a while. Probably not while I'm at uni.
N.B. I was Christian but shortly before my paranoia started I came to terms with the fact that most people don't give a **** about religion these days, even half those belonging to a religion lol. Now I'm agnostic. So really does anyone ever tell the truth at a breakup?
I'm not naive. But I'd hope that her motives for breakup were about as pure as you could get.
God I want to trust her.
Hello TSR.
We've broken up, surprise surprise.
I'm heartbroken and crying a lot, it's very painful blah blah.
She let me down in a very nice way after slowly easing off communication during exams. We went out for lunch together yesterday. She told me:
-Our secret relationship was too much stress- as you may know she is a devout Hindu and our relationship would not be approved of by her family. I know this isn't a lie due to the many rules and scriptures I've seen her follow.
She was losing sleep (as well as stress from exams), she felt she'd betrayed her family and religion for too long, she was not ready to stand up to her family, and as much as she loves me, she had to end things now. She told me all this when I first asked her out 9 months ago. Also, it will be much less painful to end now, rather than abruptly when I graduate.
-She doesn't want to be a 'burden' during my final semester of Year 3. She wants me to do great in my degree, go far and be happy.
-She's not 'The One' for me, and wants me to find someone who won't 'weigh you down' with the secrecy element
She made me promise not to give up on life or love.
She also returned all her presents, stating they're 'safer' with me than they were at her house, except for some very personal items which she's kept.
This suggests to me she's not a gold-digger.
I hold onto our secret diary.
We both want to stay friends, because once I graduate I'll probably never see her again. She says we'll hang out, she'll introduce me to her mates, etc.
I am trying my utmost not to knee-jerk her into getting back with me, respecting her wishes.
Unfortunately my paranoia has made me wonder whether she's just "letting me down gently" as we lovely people of Planet Earth do, and actually she's not as innocent and true to her faith as she says. She's hooking up with another guy as we speak (Superman most likely), I'm not the guy for her, she doesn't want to **** up her degree with the stress and doesn't give a rat's ass about how I do (or wishes me well but it's not a big deal where life takes me), etc.
I just saw my counsellor and he actually entertained these notions. He was really cynical about everything I was saying.
Yet he also said for the sake of my sanity it's best to take what she said at face value. So in other words he stuck salt in a sore wound and just made me feel confused as well as hurt...
but maybe I had to hear it.
Your thoughts on this, please. And then I don't think I'm going to want to date anyone for quite a while. Probably not while I'm at uni.
N.B. I was Christian but shortly before my paranoia started I came to terms with the fact that most people don't give a **** about religion these days, even half those belonging to a religion lol. Now I'm agnostic. So really does anyone ever tell the truth at a breakup?
I'm not naive. But I'd hope that her motives for breakup were about as pure as you could get.
God I want to trust her.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment