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How to introduce toys during sex

My wife and I have never used any sort of sex toys however I think I would like to open that door. Do I just have something waiting in the drawer next to the bed and whip it out in the heat of the moment or should we talk about it? And if I do purchase such a device, what should I get?
I have a female friend who said that when her dude is pleasing her orally that they will also use a butt plug and he will slowly move it while he is doing his thing and that it drives her absolutely crazy. This of course made me curious.
Any advice, especially advice based on experience, would be greatly appreciated. Any lovely ladies who would like to point me in the right direction based on their own experience would also be valued greatly.

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