So guys.
After reading this post I asure you you will get more Sex. Just by reading it!
Now my question?
What is your situation right now? Have you tried so many advices but still end up not getting more sex? Or are you still ready to try more new stuff to get more sex?
If you are latter, then this post here is not for u! Just stop reading. But if you are tired of not getting (wet) *****, then it is for u.
I will now let you just know 9 reasons why your wife is not interested in sex. Why she is not often enough dripping wet. Why she is not orgasming often enough. And so on..
Why and so on?
Because the reasons for most sexual problems in relationships are the same.
I wont't give advice how to solve each of the 9 problems! Sometime you will have to research yourself to how to solve them.
My aim is to make you just know where you are going wrong (but also what you are doing right!).
ST = Solution
Reason # 1
- She is tired
ST: Let her sleep and don't persue her anymore tonight. Don't!
The thing is, once she initiates sex more often, she will even become reseptive WHEN SHE IS TIRED. Till those days come, resist from persueing her.
Reason # 2
- She is sick
ST: Make sure you are supporting her in getting better as long as she is showing at least the same effort in wanting to get better! Most men overdo trying to help her get better or fix herself. She is a grown up and has to be the first one showing interest in what is best for her. Otherwise, that is not your job!
Reason # 3
- She is angry
ST:
a) She is angry because you didn't hold your word or because she truly needed support in doing sth but you didn't help. Then appologize (maximum once - dont be a sissy) and make sure u are doing better next time.
b) She is angry because you are making use of your rights as man, meaning you are visiting friends or maybe working hard at your job or whatever? Ignore her anger! This is very crucual, most men tend to argue over their rights instead of just sticking to a line continue making use of them. BACKBONE!
Ah, you dont know what your rights as a man are:
- start with:
a) making sure you are feeling good, so meet friends and have a hobby
b) security for those you love:
-Make sure you are making the best of your physical apperance (you dont need to look like the Rock), but the best means you are in good shape! Beieng able to stand up for your loved ones when they are beieng threatened or in trouble that is definately not their fault.
c) providing for those you love:
- So, maybe after reading a, you thought you could hang around home, watch TV, meet friends, while Wifey is working 10 hours a day, doing the laundry and taking care of the kids? NOOOO! This means you are making sure that your family has to eat and to wear! So make sure you are having a job.
d) Do manly things
- Most guys here want to fix there relationship, but dont know how to fix a bulb.. Make sure u understand the basics of keeping your house in shape. All that heavy duty and maybe dangerous stuff, make it your job! You will be surprised that your woman will rarely call you on laundry or dishes,because that is her part, at least it should be mostly - SO LONG U ARE DOING THE HEAVY STUFF! If you are not? Make sure you are helping her out on her end!
No matter what, it is still fine and a good example (for the kids) to help her once a while, just dont be a "yes maam" or a slave of hers.
Reason # 4
- You are presuring her
You often get the advice to talk about the lack of sex beacuse communication is so important. Yes it is, but there are certain things that tend to presure when always repeated! Stop talking about NO SEX! If you are talking about sex, make sure it is a talk in good mood! Lets say talking about how great she was or what you like or maybe dont like during sex. But not about NO SEX!
Reason # 5
- You are overdoing your attention for your woman!
This is the most difficult point for men who arent getting enough sex to keep under control! It may seem natural for you to praise your woman often, but it is more natural for you to do it only now and then again. Why is this so:
You wont like to hear this and the feminist might hate it too.. She wants sex more when SHE is able to persue you (more than you her!).
If you dont believe it, try it or read the threads on this board where women are complaining about their husbands not showing enough interest in sex!
Caution: This does not mean u should neglect or hide that u like sex! This will only work if u really dont need much sex! Therefore make sure she knows you like sex
(admit to sometime watch porn if u do, just dont make a big story or please dont go into big details. Please!.. Once a while take a short glance at an atractive woman (dont over do this, unless u are fine with her always glancing at other men!).. Once a while disqualify sth about a beautiful woman, why? Because we feel more valued when someone we asume of havong more value has a flaw (dont overdo it because she might compare herself too hard with the other and feel herself as not attractive enough).. Sometimes say thanks by slapping her butt)
and that you are complimenting her when she seems to be trying to persue you (e.g. she is walking with only a towel on around the house, or she wears nice cloths when u leave the house together.).
Now you might say, wearing a towel doesnt seem like persueing me, or wearing a nice dress could be also for other men or other women.. SHUT UP! Asume it is for you and let her know you like it.
The thing is, you not overdoing your attention! So compliment her and focus back on sth else! Dont even think of trying to seduce her just because things just seem right right now! Remember! It is not the first time things seem right and u end up turned down! So dont spoil the TENSION! Believe me, if you dont show frustration and keep on beieng happy without sex, she will soon be very direct in her approach for sex. When that day comes, dont rush to accepting, make sure you are not leaving what u are doing or wanted to do in the next 10 min just for sex. Why? Because women love men with integrity, so finish what you were doing (even if she threatens u!) and postpond the act of sex to later (30 min, 2 hours, today eviening, tomorrow morning etc..). Most men are incapable of doing this, they jump into sex, then are angry when they arent getting more sex after this one time.
The key to get sex when you want, ist to be able to turn it down when you want.
That is even the reason your wife is always getting sex when she wants from you, because you are focusing too much on getting any because you are afraid to dry out..
Reason # 6
- You not respecting yourself. I mentioned integrity up here. If you arent assertive enough to keep your integrity, people lose respect for you. You find yourself struggling for more attention, but if you are a man who has values which he defends with integrity, u are respected and adored.
Dont misunderstand. You should not always be so assertive that u are an *sshole, but you should be sometimes!
- You comparing yourself to hard
The keyword here is jealousy! If you always snap when your woman or when other people talk good about potential rivals, they will start to enjoy doing so. So if your wife once in a while is talking about other men, dont get driven by your emotions. Stay calm and have fun in making fun with her. Even compliment her on be wanted by so many men. Just make sure you arent hanging around her too long, because in most cases u might get emotional finally.
The best way to kill jealousy-making-talk is you to talk about another woman you met or know. That will shut both of you up in no time. U dont know any other attractive women?
1. they dont need to be super attractive. She will get jealous by the fact that YOU TOO have a foot in the flirt-market.
2. U dont have other women in your life right now?
Fake/create one or two women. You dont know how to do it without exagerating? Then carefully listen to how you woman tells her stories about other men! She never is spesific and when your interest for the topic rises, she either changes the topic or only gives you half answers. Do it the same. Just make sure you change the topic after a few sentences.
Reason # 7
- You not beieng able to handle her. Just ask yourself following quastions:
a) Are able to say no to her and stick to it?
b) Are able to say no to a compromise because the deal is not good for you?
c) Are you able to ignore her without beieng passive aggresive when she ignores you?
d) Are you able to resist arguing with her when it comes to her trying to tell you how to behave and just letting her talk so that she can let her anger out?
e) when she corrects you, can you resist trying to please her?
f) Are you able to tell her to help you do sth or to tell her to do sth smal for you?
g) Are you able to walk out when you notice that she is not complying in something important
h) Are you able to disqualify her when she is doing sth wrong or are you the guy that needs to make her feel good all the time?
i) When she does sth wonderful for you or herself, but you still have anger in yourself about sth, are you able to swallow the anger and focus on her current archievment and support her in feeling good about it?
j) Are you able to forgive her small mistakes when you are angry because of not getting sex?
k) Are you ever too tired for sex tonight?
l) Are you ever pretending to be tired for sex tonight?
The more questions you answered with Yes, the better.
Reason # 8
- You beieng or letting things be predictible
A very crucial point.
- Are you always initiating sex at the same time? (e.g. while watching TV, while in Bed, only evenings, only mornings etc..)
- Is she always turning you down, but you never turn her down?
- Are you always angry when you are turned down?
- Are you always using the same skill/foreplay to get her hot?
- Are you always doing foreplay?
- Are you always c*mming inside her or are u also be a "bad boy" and cumming on her breast , stomach, face etc..
- Are you always focused on her during foreplay or sex?
- Are you always rough?
- Are you always tender?
- Are you always having long sex?
- Do you always allow foreplay or sexy lingerie lead to sex?
- Always missionary sex?
The point prediction is sensitive because it often means that one partner will have to do sth out of order and will risk not only disapproval from the other, but also anger or a fight. The solution is to be assertive in order to spice up sth by variety or leave it! Make sure your assertiveness when it comes to sex is alwasy done with a smile and without rage!!!!
As a man the fear not to get sex, or not to finish sex is sometimes so huge that u will tend to always give in to do things her way.. You are doing the wrong thing. Remember:
Each time you ignore this fact, you are driving away from more and better sex!
PS: Once she has turned you down often, it becomes a habit. Sometime she will actually want sex, but out of a refley, she will turn you down.. and then she will not take it back because it might affect her self-pride. So make sure u are not always predictible, but dont stress yourself in trying to be full of variety, because that is strassy and predictable too. Relax and make sure that once a while yu are chnaging a smal aspect of sth!
Reason # 9
- You arent sexy yourself:
Guys, there are enough books and advices in what is a sexy man. It is up to you to choose who is your adviser here, but what applies TO ALL GUYS is to be clean and in shape. Ok, beieng dirty once in a while because of heavy duty can be a turn on to your woman sometimes ;-). We all know that..
So therefore let me remind you what you need to develop a SEXY PERSONALITY:
Focus on beieng happy yourself (as already mentioned). A happy man who doesnt get angry because of any sexual thing is much more attractive than the one who presures his wife in sexual matters till she cant enjoy thinking of making love!!
There are so many ways to be happy, so make sure you find out for yourself what makes you happy.
The basics in beieng happy usually are:
a) Not trying too hard to be happy. Why? Because when u start to feel frustration, you are distancing yourself from beieng happy, meaning what you believe will make you happy is far out of reach because it will cost you too much energie and resources!
Happiness is like a butterfly, when you chase it too hard it is uncatchable, when you take a rest from chasing it, it comes to you.
b) distracting yourself from things that make you sad, angry or frustrated. Make sure you are FIRST always focusing on the positive side of the coin! A glass can be half empty or half full!
This does not mean that Sadness, Anger and Frustration should not exist in your life! NO! It is healthy to have them in your life in order for you too be emotionaly balanced!
It more means that you should acknowledge them and then ask yourself in which situation you are feeling them. When it is always because of the same situation, then it is time to let go of the sitaution when possible or to distract yourself by actively doing sth that will change your focus.
Our mind can only let you be filled by one thought or feeling at a time.
Be it sadness, be it anger, be it frustration, be it anticipation, be it joy.
Sometimes it is the thought that causes the feeling, sometimes the feeling that causes the thought. Make an advantage of this. When u are tired of beieng sad or frustrated, smile (or do sth that usually makes you happy) and you will soon remember sth positive and then you will feel the feeling that usually causes u to smile.
..
So, at the beginning you remember me saying that just reading this post will get you more sex?
I lied..
You distancing yourself from your sexlife for some weeks and looking out for the points and reasons I stated up here will.
With best regards
PsyM.
After reading this post I asure you you will get more Sex. Just by reading it!
Now my question?
What is your situation right now? Have you tried so many advices but still end up not getting more sex? Or are you still ready to try more new stuff to get more sex?
If you are latter, then this post here is not for u! Just stop reading. But if you are tired of not getting (wet) *****, then it is for u.
I will now let you just know 9 reasons why your wife is not interested in sex. Why she is not often enough dripping wet. Why she is not orgasming often enough. And so on..
Why and so on?
Because the reasons for most sexual problems in relationships are the same.
I wont't give advice how to solve each of the 9 problems! Sometime you will have to research yourself to how to solve them.
My aim is to make you just know where you are going wrong (but also what you are doing right!).
ST = Solution
Reason # 1
- She is tired
ST: Let her sleep and don't persue her anymore tonight. Don't!
The thing is, once she initiates sex more often, she will even become reseptive WHEN SHE IS TIRED. Till those days come, resist from persueing her.
Reason # 2
- She is sick
ST: Make sure you are supporting her in getting better as long as she is showing at least the same effort in wanting to get better! Most men overdo trying to help her get better or fix herself. She is a grown up and has to be the first one showing interest in what is best for her. Otherwise, that is not your job!
Reason # 3
- She is angry
ST:
a) She is angry because you didn't hold your word or because she truly needed support in doing sth but you didn't help. Then appologize (maximum once - dont be a sissy) and make sure u are doing better next time.
b) She is angry because you are making use of your rights as man, meaning you are visiting friends or maybe working hard at your job or whatever? Ignore her anger! This is very crucual, most men tend to argue over their rights instead of just sticking to a line continue making use of them. BACKBONE!
Ah, you dont know what your rights as a man are:
- start with:
a) making sure you are feeling good, so meet friends and have a hobby
b) security for those you love:
-Make sure you are making the best of your physical apperance (you dont need to look like the Rock), but the best means you are in good shape! Beieng able to stand up for your loved ones when they are beieng threatened or in trouble that is definately not their fault.
c) providing for those you love:
- So, maybe after reading a, you thought you could hang around home, watch TV, meet friends, while Wifey is working 10 hours a day, doing the laundry and taking care of the kids? NOOOO! This means you are making sure that your family has to eat and to wear! So make sure you are having a job.
d) Do manly things
- Most guys here want to fix there relationship, but dont know how to fix a bulb.. Make sure u understand the basics of keeping your house in shape. All that heavy duty and maybe dangerous stuff, make it your job! You will be surprised that your woman will rarely call you on laundry or dishes,because that is her part, at least it should be mostly - SO LONG U ARE DOING THE HEAVY STUFF! If you are not? Make sure you are helping her out on her end!
No matter what, it is still fine and a good example (for the kids) to help her once a while, just dont be a "yes maam" or a slave of hers.
Reason # 4
- You are presuring her
You often get the advice to talk about the lack of sex beacuse communication is so important. Yes it is, but there are certain things that tend to presure when always repeated! Stop talking about NO SEX! If you are talking about sex, make sure it is a talk in good mood! Lets say talking about how great she was or what you like or maybe dont like during sex. But not about NO SEX!
Reason # 5
- You are overdoing your attention for your woman!
This is the most difficult point for men who arent getting enough sex to keep under control! It may seem natural for you to praise your woman often, but it is more natural for you to do it only now and then again. Why is this so:
You wont like to hear this and the feminist might hate it too.. She wants sex more when SHE is able to persue you (more than you her!).
If you dont believe it, try it or read the threads on this board where women are complaining about their husbands not showing enough interest in sex!
Caution: This does not mean u should neglect or hide that u like sex! This will only work if u really dont need much sex! Therefore make sure she knows you like sex
(admit to sometime watch porn if u do, just dont make a big story or please dont go into big details. Please!.. Once a while take a short glance at an atractive woman (dont over do this, unless u are fine with her always glancing at other men!).. Once a while disqualify sth about a beautiful woman, why? Because we feel more valued when someone we asume of havong more value has a flaw (dont overdo it because she might compare herself too hard with the other and feel herself as not attractive enough).. Sometimes say thanks by slapping her butt)
and that you are complimenting her when she seems to be trying to persue you (e.g. she is walking with only a towel on around the house, or she wears nice cloths when u leave the house together.).
Now you might say, wearing a towel doesnt seem like persueing me, or wearing a nice dress could be also for other men or other women.. SHUT UP! Asume it is for you and let her know you like it.
The thing is, you not overdoing your attention! So compliment her and focus back on sth else! Dont even think of trying to seduce her just because things just seem right right now! Remember! It is not the first time things seem right and u end up turned down! So dont spoil the TENSION! Believe me, if you dont show frustration and keep on beieng happy without sex, she will soon be very direct in her approach for sex. When that day comes, dont rush to accepting, make sure you are not leaving what u are doing or wanted to do in the next 10 min just for sex. Why? Because women love men with integrity, so finish what you were doing (even if she threatens u!) and postpond the act of sex to later (30 min, 2 hours, today eviening, tomorrow morning etc..). Most men are incapable of doing this, they jump into sex, then are angry when they arent getting more sex after this one time.
The key to get sex when you want, ist to be able to turn it down when you want.
That is even the reason your wife is always getting sex when she wants from you, because you are focusing too much on getting any because you are afraid to dry out..
Reason # 6
- You not respecting yourself. I mentioned integrity up here. If you arent assertive enough to keep your integrity, people lose respect for you. You find yourself struggling for more attention, but if you are a man who has values which he defends with integrity, u are respected and adored.
Dont misunderstand. You should not always be so assertive that u are an *sshole, but you should be sometimes!
- You comparing yourself to hard
The keyword here is jealousy! If you always snap when your woman or when other people talk good about potential rivals, they will start to enjoy doing so. So if your wife once in a while is talking about other men, dont get driven by your emotions. Stay calm and have fun in making fun with her. Even compliment her on be wanted by so many men. Just make sure you arent hanging around her too long, because in most cases u might get emotional finally.
The best way to kill jealousy-making-talk is you to talk about another woman you met or know. That will shut both of you up in no time. U dont know any other attractive women?
1. they dont need to be super attractive. She will get jealous by the fact that YOU TOO have a foot in the flirt-market.
2. U dont have other women in your life right now?
Fake/create one or two women. You dont know how to do it without exagerating? Then carefully listen to how you woman tells her stories about other men! She never is spesific and when your interest for the topic rises, she either changes the topic or only gives you half answers. Do it the same. Just make sure you change the topic after a few sentences.
Reason # 7
- You not beieng able to handle her. Just ask yourself following quastions:
a) Are able to say no to her and stick to it?
b) Are able to say no to a compromise because the deal is not good for you?
c) Are you able to ignore her without beieng passive aggresive when she ignores you?
d) Are you able to resist arguing with her when it comes to her trying to tell you how to behave and just letting her talk so that she can let her anger out?
e) when she corrects you, can you resist trying to please her?
f) Are you able to tell her to help you do sth or to tell her to do sth smal for you?
g) Are you able to walk out when you notice that she is not complying in something important
h) Are you able to disqualify her when she is doing sth wrong or are you the guy that needs to make her feel good all the time?
i) When she does sth wonderful for you or herself, but you still have anger in yourself about sth, are you able to swallow the anger and focus on her current archievment and support her in feeling good about it?
j) Are you able to forgive her small mistakes when you are angry because of not getting sex?
k) Are you ever too tired for sex tonight?
l) Are you ever pretending to be tired for sex tonight?
The more questions you answered with Yes, the better.
Reason # 8
- You beieng or letting things be predictible
A very crucial point.
- Are you always initiating sex at the same time? (e.g. while watching TV, while in Bed, only evenings, only mornings etc..)
- Is she always turning you down, but you never turn her down?
- Are you always angry when you are turned down?
- Are you always using the same skill/foreplay to get her hot?
- Are you always doing foreplay?
- Are you always c*mming inside her or are u also be a "bad boy" and cumming on her breast , stomach, face etc..
- Are you always focused on her during foreplay or sex?
- Are you always rough?
- Are you always tender?
- Are you always having long sex?
- Do you always allow foreplay or sexy lingerie lead to sex?
- Always missionary sex?
The point prediction is sensitive because it often means that one partner will have to do sth out of order and will risk not only disapproval from the other, but also anger or a fight. The solution is to be assertive in order to spice up sth by variety or leave it! Make sure your assertiveness when it comes to sex is alwasy done with a smile and without rage!!!!
As a man the fear not to get sex, or not to finish sex is sometimes so huge that u will tend to always give in to do things her way.. You are doing the wrong thing. Remember:
Quote:
| The key to get sex when you want, ist to be able to turn it down when you want. |
PS: Once she has turned you down often, it becomes a habit. Sometime she will actually want sex, but out of a refley, she will turn you down.. and then she will not take it back because it might affect her self-pride. So make sure u are not always predictible, but dont stress yourself in trying to be full of variety, because that is strassy and predictable too. Relax and make sure that once a while yu are chnaging a smal aspect of sth!
Reason # 9
- You arent sexy yourself:
Guys, there are enough books and advices in what is a sexy man. It is up to you to choose who is your adviser here, but what applies TO ALL GUYS is to be clean and in shape. Ok, beieng dirty once in a while because of heavy duty can be a turn on to your woman sometimes ;-). We all know that..
So therefore let me remind you what you need to develop a SEXY PERSONALITY:
Focus on beieng happy yourself (as already mentioned). A happy man who doesnt get angry because of any sexual thing is much more attractive than the one who presures his wife in sexual matters till she cant enjoy thinking of making love!!
There are so many ways to be happy, so make sure you find out for yourself what makes you happy.
The basics in beieng happy usually are:
a) Not trying too hard to be happy. Why? Because when u start to feel frustration, you are distancing yourself from beieng happy, meaning what you believe will make you happy is far out of reach because it will cost you too much energie and resources!
Happiness is like a butterfly, when you chase it too hard it is uncatchable, when you take a rest from chasing it, it comes to you.
b) distracting yourself from things that make you sad, angry or frustrated. Make sure you are FIRST always focusing on the positive side of the coin! A glass can be half empty or half full!
This does not mean that Sadness, Anger and Frustration should not exist in your life! NO! It is healthy to have them in your life in order for you too be emotionaly balanced!
It more means that you should acknowledge them and then ask yourself in which situation you are feeling them. When it is always because of the same situation, then it is time to let go of the sitaution when possible or to distract yourself by actively doing sth that will change your focus.
Our mind can only let you be filled by one thought or feeling at a time.
Be it sadness, be it anger, be it frustration, be it anticipation, be it joy.
Sometimes it is the thought that causes the feeling, sometimes the feeling that causes the thought. Make an advantage of this. When u are tired of beieng sad or frustrated, smile (or do sth that usually makes you happy) and you will soon remember sth positive and then you will feel the feeling that usually causes u to smile.
..
So, at the beginning you remember me saying that just reading this post will get you more sex?
I lied..
You distancing yourself from your sexlife for some weeks and looking out for the points and reasons I stated up here will.
With best regards
PsyM.
Put the internet to work for you.
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