Not sure what to do. Please help

About 8 months ago my wife (of 9 years) went out of town for a wedding without me. When she came back, I noticed some odd behavior, such as being distant, working out more, changing her clothes and appearance, etc... Her behavior toward me changed and she basically was marginalizing me in her life. Being very brazen and uncaring. At first I thought it was a friend rubbing off on her or something, but then... I found out she was texting this guy she met at the wedding. She'd lay in bed and do this before bed time almost every night. I asked her about it and she lied and said it was her girlfriend. Knowing she lied, I looked up the phone records. Tons of texts and calls early in the morning before I got up. Long calls at all hours to this guy when she went on a girls vacation shortly after this wedding. Unfortunately, I confronted her over the phone because I was very upset (and in the process, she covered her tracks). She continued to lie but I finally got it out of her it was a guy and where she met him. She swears up and down nothing happened, but there was no reason to lie because I've never been jealous and I'm okay with her having guy friends and vice versa. I got it out of her that she was sexually attracted to him and she thought about having sex with him. But, she swears nothing happened. I'm not dumb. I know you don't have that kind of contact with someone, lie about it, and nothing's going on. So I've been suspicious and untrusting, but I couldn't prove anything. Fast forward 8 months later, I see this guy is face timing her on her iPhone last night. I'm all the way across the country for another 2 months and can't confront her in person and I don't want to alert her that I'm aware of them talking before I see more of their communication. (I think I should point out this guy lives out of state, so they probably aren't in constant physical contact) So needless to say I'm freaking out right now. I've known her since we were in high school (we got married later) and I thought we both really loved each other before this. Any suggestions on how to handle this? I feel pretty confident something happened or may still be happening. Do I sound crazy? It sucks because I just don't really trust her any more and I'm too far away to do anything. Please, I really need some advice.

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