Closure

Based upon my previous posts in 'Flip Flop', I have made up my mind..........the trick is getting someone else to make up their mind!! I can't go back to the way it was. The last several days have been filled with coffee and Xanex to keep the old nerves calm. My children appear to be happy primarily because they are allowed to do whatever they want and when they want to do it! The house is filthy, or at least it was the last time I was there..........and she does not care! Too involved with going to school, getting her hair done, adding to the wardrobe, etc., etc. Based upon some foolish behavior by me, she has full custody of the children.......I deserve that! But I want this madness to be over, I want the divorce to be finalized, finished, whatever you want to call it but it just seems to keep dragging on and on and on. I NEED closure. I had asked her what her intensions were. "Living my life, working hard in school, and taking care of my kids"........well she is definately living her life and working hard in school.........I'll give her that much. I don't post a whole lot here, but would like some suggestions. I am not a big medications kind of guy, but the Xanex has really helped over the last several days. I have stopped drinking. I will be starting some counseling first of next week to work on my anger issues..........just need to work on this jumbled mess that is going on between my ears :(.......... Give me your thoughts please.............

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