| I'm a 25 good looking guy and I've been engaged this girl now for just over two years. I've only choosen to be in a few serious relationships (single digits still) and never been big on the "casual sex" thing, it just doesn't give me the same feeling as when you're connected with someone.... so I don't date just anyone. And this is the only time I've been engaged... I take commitment very seriously I'll try to keep this post short but I really need help... and after reading these threads I finally feel I might get some answers... I've never cheated because the first "relationship" I had I was cheated on and forgave, just to be hurt again. That being said I dated a woman for over four years and never felt anything like I do/did for this one. She's everything you could hope for. Or so I thought.. I had told her cheating was the one thing I couldn't tolerate in a relationship and we spent 10+ hours everyday together till I got back to work in June. We made a mutual couple friend who we hung out with 2-3 times a week at the start of Sept. By the end of Oct the couple had split and we remained social with the male... My girl wasn't working and I had a m-f night shift job, so naturally I became to trusting and was OK with them hanging out alone after I left for work at 9pm... Well new years the three of us headed down to her dads and I worked remotely from her dads office that night (someone has to pay the bills). And around 2am I come out and find the love of my life with her face smashed on his full on making out. I confronted her and she swore it was a mistake and that's the first time.... I was crushed so I left alone and went back to the apt we share (she continued to mess around and had oral and regular sex with him AFTER I caught them kiss and left pissed).... we talked for almost # days straight and she swore it was only a kiss... so I forgave (she was plastered that night and she never drinks so I was willing to be fair).... even was so dumb as to try to "win back" her affection and pampered her that Friday. At this point the OM hadn't been welcome but she asked me to try to save our friendship and I finally said OK as long as it was JUST a kiss and it won't happen again we can forget it... long story short about two weeks later she conf essed... impulsively even prehaps... that they had slept together twice and she had given him head at least three times plus tons of cuddle nights (pg ones but still emotionally intimate) ... she had real pain and regret in her eyes and every red flag in my emotional mind is telling me to get out of dodge now... However logic deserves a say in any decision not associated with regret... that being said I'm not defending her just helping you understand the whole picture... she's never been cheated on and I honestly believe she did it purely out of intreque and taboo.... the physically part I can get past.....but not the lies... and what really scares me is after reading so many threads I see common occurances...she told me it was quick, he was small, and it was unenjoyable. she said she started crying immediately after the second time... I kn ow She has taken steps to show me how bad she feels. She feels taken advantage of and all I feel is sickness... I can't stop picturing the acts... and thinking how it happened when I was at work making money to pay our bills... we left everything and loaded up the car to drive ccross the country to start a new life as equal partners.. and I'd like to think we can make it and dispite everything I still love this woman and want it to work.... its just im writing this from a truck stop unable to stop thinking about it... and just don't have anyone to offer sound advice, everyone is so quick to judge..... Thank you and PS. And do these feeling of insecurity ever fade? Posted via Mobile Device | |||
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