I'm 39 years old and have been with my wife since we were both about 20. We dated for 12 years and have been married for the last 7+. Throughout we have had our share of issues, but we always managed to correct them and move along. In hindsight, maybe we should have realized that it wouldn't really get better and we could have cut our losses many years earlier. We have a 3 year old daughter who is totally awesome. My wife is great with her and loves her very much. It's me she seems to be able to take or leave. Unlike some more "traditional" relationships, I tend to be the shopper, cooker and cleaner around the house. It hasn't always been quite as bad as right now, but it seemed like the easiest way to stop having to hear about how much she hates doing all of that stuff. We both work full time jobs and during the day our daughter is in Montessori (glorified daycare - wife's idea). For the last 5 years, my wife has been a bellydancer and instructor. In ful filling those commitments, she doesn't come home from work until after our daughter is in bed 2 nights a week. She is also gone for most of the day once each weekend. I also play baseball in a competitive league in our city. We play 24 games from late May until late August. Once our daughter was born, however, I stopped attending any of my teams' games that started before my daughter was in bed for the night. I felt that being home with her was more important, and I preferred it anyway. My wife on the other hand, seems to have increased her time away. She has actually told me that since I don't play any early games anymore, why do both of us need to be home? As though I stopped playing those games to free her up for more "her" time. She also frequently tells me of these "shows" she needs to attend that usually encompass entire weekends. Couple that with the fact that she travels with work about 3-5 overnights per month, and I spend a lot of time as a single parent. We also h ave a large dog that she hasn't taken for a walk in over 5 years. That means that 3 times a day, I have to bundle my daughter up and take the dog out on top of the rest. It's not like I can't handle all of this, because I can. It's rather easy and enjoyable. It's just that the time she does spend at home, she spends grumpy about all manner of tiny little concerns that nobody else on Earth would care about. Our sex life is non-existant, and she's messy and lazy at the same time. When I ask her to put something away, she acts as though I have standards that are unattainable. This morning, as I was walking out the door for work, she asked me to feed my daughter and take her to school because she had a meeting she needed to get to. She gave no advanced warning. I had to call my boss and explain I would be late, and she did it all in a rather angry yet expectant tone. Once a month I look at my wife and realize I love her very much. Sometimes I feel it may be due to the length of our history but I can't help it. I have no idea what to do next.
Put the internet to work for you.
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