| My first proper relationship was with this guy who was two years older than me. I was 16 when we met and we were together for about a year. Whilst we were together he would be extremely emotionally/psychologically abusive to me, telling me I was worthless, making me feel terrified of him, making threats if I even talked to another guy. He never actually hit me but many times I felt like he was about to. I finally broke down in tears to a family member and ended the relationship. I haven't really talked to anybody about it because I blame myself for staying with him for so long. Sometimes I have nightmares where I'm still with him and I wake up terrified in a cold sweat. Now, a few years later, I am at uni and have made awful choices concerning men. I don't feel like anyone would want to have a meaningful relationship with me so I've been sleeping with random guys or having short, disastrous relationships. I want to find someone, eventually, who I want to settle down with but I can't see this happening while I still feel so worthless. How do I move on? | |||
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