I have been together with my wife for 15 years, married for 12. We're both in our upper 30's and in good shape, have 2 kids, and spend quite a bit of time working these days -- just wanted to lay the foundation.
So here's my situation, we currently have sex about once a month, and when we do I can tell she's really just doing it to keep me happy for the next month -- keep in mind I don't mind that we only have sex once a month (it's fine for me if we're both into it).
So a few months back I was downstairs playing with my kids and ran upstairs to get something, when I opened the door to my room, there was my wife spread eagle with vibrator in hand! Again, keep in mind this does not bother me, I actually was turned on by it. But then I wondered, how often does she masturbate? I know where she keeps her little "friend", so over the course of the past few months I would check in the drawer to see if it was moving around (this drawer serves no other purpose, so a change in position is pretty much equal to a quick orgasm) -- and sure enough, it was, ~ 3 times a week!
Now here I am, 3 months later, obviously my wife has an urge to fulfill, now I'm wondering if she doesn't want (or need) me to partipate. I know for sure she would never cheat on me, however I want to understand, is this normal?? I'm no saint here either, I masturbate ~5 times a week, for me it serves two purposes:
1) as a stress relief
2) to control my urges
I'm still very attracted to my wife and fantasize about being with her all the time, just not sure the feeling is mutual anymore.
I never thought of masturbation for women as a quick "stress relief" similar to a guy -- however maybe that's the case?? That, or, she's completely lost desire to have sex with me and I have bigger issues to deal with. To be honest, my eyes have really started to wander these days and I'm hoping this will pass.
So here's my situation, we currently have sex about once a month, and when we do I can tell she's really just doing it to keep me happy for the next month -- keep in mind I don't mind that we only have sex once a month (it's fine for me if we're both into it).
So a few months back I was downstairs playing with my kids and ran upstairs to get something, when I opened the door to my room, there was my wife spread eagle with vibrator in hand! Again, keep in mind this does not bother me, I actually was turned on by it. But then I wondered, how often does she masturbate? I know where she keeps her little "friend", so over the course of the past few months I would check in the drawer to see if it was moving around (this drawer serves no other purpose, so a change in position is pretty much equal to a quick orgasm) -- and sure enough, it was, ~ 3 times a week!
Now here I am, 3 months later, obviously my wife has an urge to fulfill, now I'm wondering if she doesn't want (or need) me to partipate. I know for sure she would never cheat on me, however I want to understand, is this normal?? I'm no saint here either, I masturbate ~5 times a week, for me it serves two purposes:
1) as a stress relief
2) to control my urges
I'm still very attracted to my wife and fantasize about being with her all the time, just not sure the feeling is mutual anymore.
I never thought of masturbation for women as a quick "stress relief" similar to a guy -- however maybe that's the case?? That, or, she's completely lost desire to have sex with me and I have bigger issues to deal with. To be honest, my eyes have really started to wander these days and I'm hoping this will pass.
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