I have been married for the last 20 years, with my wife for the last 30 years. The past 6 or 7 years have been a bit rocky with this past year being the worst. She has gone through a great deal of medical problems in the past 10 or so years which although stressful, I have been supportive. One of her conditions causes her to take medications that greatly reduce her sex drive. That said, intimacy in our lives is pretty non existant. My concern is not so much with that, but simply feeling unloved in any form. Don't get me wrong, I have a desire for passion but I have come to terms that I will not experience this in my life again...sadly. Recently about a year ago I decided to do something that would take my mind off of my love life and help to make me feel better about myself. I decided to get my health in order by excersizing and eating better. I ended up losing a great deal of weight and have not been in this good a shape in my life. I tried to get my wi fe onboard thinking that it might give us a common goal, something that we could do together. I did not insinuate that she needed to or make any derogatory comment about her appearance as I know how women can feel about those sorts of things. She refused my offers and proceeded to mock me in front of our children, telling them that I was anorexic and making me feel guilty for working out. The insults went on and still continue to some extent although at this point she she has told me that she is no longer attracted to me which frankly has left me devastated. Where do I go from here? We can not afford to seperate or divorce. Sometimes I think it will get better, but deep inside I know that it will not, even if I put all my weight back on, the damge is done. I am lonely, hurt, confused, ashamed.
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