I've posted before about my 28 year marriage and my husbands EA with his X. I feel I am at a crossroads and am thinking about doing something pretty unusual for my circumstances. These are the raw facts: * found out by reading his texts he loves this girl *he is telling her he is considering leaving me and being with her in another state. * she has been married 30 years * says he has no passion for me anymore *he communicates with her more than with me *don't know if they have been together physically but I think so *they both have chronic pain from fibro myalga * she said they need to see each other by spring to know for sure whether they want to be in a full time relationship.
All the while he is telling me he is still in love with me and wants to keep trying on our marriage. I have done all the things to prepare for a divorce and am feeling scared but ready to leave him. My idea is to confront him and tell him I cant be in this triangle anymore. I want to tell him to go see her and make a decision once and for all. If he can admit he needs to let her go and will go to marriage counseling I am willing to try and save our marriage. I'm feeling like if he choses to stay with me that he will have to see her to get closure. Or they will feel their love is stronger and I will know I have to move forward with my life without him.
Am I encouraging them to be together or am I forcing his hand so I can live a less toxic life? I really don't think the grass is gonna be greener but I might be wrong and need to know.
All the while he is telling me he is still in love with me and wants to keep trying on our marriage. I have done all the things to prepare for a divorce and am feeling scared but ready to leave him. My idea is to confront him and tell him I cant be in this triangle anymore. I want to tell him to go see her and make a decision once and for all. If he can admit he needs to let her go and will go to marriage counseling I am willing to try and save our marriage. I'm feeling like if he choses to stay with me that he will have to see her to get closure. Or they will feel their love is stronger and I will know I have to move forward with my life without him.
Am I encouraging them to be together or am I forcing his hand so I can live a less toxic life? I really don't think the grass is gonna be greener but I might be wrong and need to know.
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