Those were the words from my therapist. Not that she had changed or that I had to change, just that I had to recognize her if I was going to work through this. Let go of the idealized notion. I didn't like it and didn't want to. But now I do see her differently and not better. I married her in large part because I did not think she had that in her. My guess is that she did not know either. Bygones. I would like to stay married and expect that we will at least for some time but everything is different. I wouldn't marry her again.
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