I am a married man for 16 years, been with my wife for 21. We have 2 kids 6 and 9.
I am at a complete loss as to what to do. Over the last year I have found myself so disconnected from my wife that even intimacy doesnt seem interesting. When I look at my wife I just cant find that deep love. I try but its not there. We have spoken over the last few months about this and about separating.
In July she left the state for a month with the kids to visit family as I stayed behind. I enjoyed my alone time except for missing the kids. I decided half way through the month I would fly out and see the kids and see if there was anything still between us but even after a planned romantic getaway I still felt so alone and not connected.
We talked about this while I was out and she told me I deserve to be happy with someone. We always agreed we would never keep the other from being happy. We talked some more and at the end of the conversation she gave me her ring and told me when I find that love as a marriage I can propose to her again. I still have the ring and honestly dont think twice about giving back.
I have thought a lot about separating and divorce and my friends tell me I need to do whats best for me but I feel I need to take care of her...make sure she doesnt struggle.
I am often feeling depressed which is not like me. I feel I cannot control the way I feel or find a way to make this work. We talked about marriage counseling but havent made an appointment.
Any advise would be helpful as I am struggling to find the truth in me.
I am at a complete loss as to what to do. Over the last year I have found myself so disconnected from my wife that even intimacy doesnt seem interesting. When I look at my wife I just cant find that deep love. I try but its not there. We have spoken over the last few months about this and about separating.
In July she left the state for a month with the kids to visit family as I stayed behind. I enjoyed my alone time except for missing the kids. I decided half way through the month I would fly out and see the kids and see if there was anything still between us but even after a planned romantic getaway I still felt so alone and not connected.
We talked about this while I was out and she told me I deserve to be happy with someone. We always agreed we would never keep the other from being happy. We talked some more and at the end of the conversation she gave me her ring and told me when I find that love as a marriage I can propose to her again. I still have the ring and honestly dont think twice about giving back.
I have thought a lot about separating and divorce and my friends tell me I need to do whats best for me but I feel I need to take care of her...make sure she doesnt struggle.
I am often feeling depressed which is not like me. I feel I cannot control the way I feel or find a way to make this work. We talked about marriage counseling but havent made an appointment.
Any advise would be helpful as I am struggling to find the truth in me.
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