I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 8 months now. We're on excellent terms, and have both gone home for the summer (we live about 100 miles from one another). A few weeks back I found out his ex will be staying at his for 5 nights whilst I'm away.
Some background - his ex and him were together for a few years, and afaik had tried a long distance relationship in some form (as she's from America) but they broke up after arguments and disagreements and haven't seen each other for a couple of years. Whilst I've been with him he's been very open about his past relationships and from what he's said of her I have no reason to believe he still has any romantic feelings for her. His ex now has another boyfriend, and they've been visiting Europe on a holiday, and will be sleeping at my boyfriend's for a few nights as a layover. I found out after accidentally reading an email his mother sent him to say she was stopping over. She's a good family friend and gets on well with his mother, so whilst her knowing before him didn't surprise me, it still felt a little odd that he didn't tell me right away.
I discussed that this made me feel a little uncomfortable with my boyfriend, and he offered to make sure he wasn't around when they were over, but I didn't want him not seeing her altogether as I appreciate that they're good friends and she's helped him recently with his academic work. He also assured me that he felt uncomfortable over her bringing her boyfriend with her too. However, even now that she's arrived there I'm still not sure how to feel. This isn't so much about what they'll get up to (which is nothing, as far as I'm concerned - I trust both of them) but more about respect. Why couldn't she have stayed in a hotel nearby or something? Why didn't he ask me if it was ok first before I found out after seeing the email from his Mum about it? I kind of feel a little bit like I've been bypassed completely. I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and discuss this after she's left so that I don't step on his toes whilst they're catching up, but I don't know whethe r I'm just being petty and selfish. What're you're thoughts on this? :S
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