This is a point that has come up on several different threads that I have read and I just wanted to get some insight on to how may WS have had toxic friends that have helped, aided, abetted, assisted or added to the downfall of a marriage.
My EX had a very toxic friend. She was what my wife called her best friend as she lived 3 houses down. She and I did not get along well. She liked to start arguments with me and I did not engage. She was decent to me but definitely not someone I would hang around with, ever...
Her personality on a Winnie the Pooh scale was that of EOR. She was always negative, always complaining, always wanting something more out of her life... I am not a fan of people like that. You make a choice and you don't like the consequences... whatever...
So when I had my Dday, my psyche was shattered. I was in the 'Save what I have' mode for a while. It took me a few weeks to find myself. It would have definitely been different if we did not have children together.
We did go to MC and come to find out. In MC I got the passwords to her email. She deleted all of her emails but I was able to get a few that were not and they were from this woman. I come to find out that she knew my wife was having an affair. She had been constantly undermining our marriage. I had no clue about this. My EX would go over a drink wine at her house once a week and I was fine with it. I didn't want to be there but my EX seemed happy and so I didn't realize it was just a huge ***** session.
The email I found was that they needed to talk, my EX and the toxic friend... M... is going out of town for work and K... is coming in town.
When we were separated, my EX lived with her for a few months... 3 doors down, very retarded... I cut her off financially. My EX would want my kids to go over there. She was hoping that my youngest and the daughter of her toxic friend would be bf/gf... I squashed that.
I told my kids what this woman did. I made it known to them that while she was not the downfall of our marriage, she had no right interfering into our marriage and that is not something that should be overlooked.
My kids took some of their anger out on her. They stopped being friends with her children. The woman decided that she needed to move so they moved away. I was very happy with that. I moved a month later.
It has been the ongoing thought that one of my old neighbors and I have is that this woman was miserable and was having an affair vicariously through my wife. It was nice for her. Misery loves company. She would not be affected by the devastation she helped bring. I will actually close my book on them after my custody battle is ended.
I had told my EX that this person who was considered to be her best friend was not a friend at all. My EX and her best friend do not speak to one another any more. It is amazing and so easily foreseeable that after the affair was over the toxic friend had no more use for my EX. My EX and this toxic friend are not friends any more. I guess that was another dose of reality for my EX.
I am just amazed at how many WS have had toxic friends. I don't hang around guys who don't have my morals. I just don't. It's simple. I was just curious as to how pervasive the toxic friends are in the affairs or not.
My EX had a very toxic friend. She was what my wife called her best friend as she lived 3 houses down. She and I did not get along well. She liked to start arguments with me and I did not engage. She was decent to me but definitely not someone I would hang around with, ever...
Her personality on a Winnie the Pooh scale was that of EOR. She was always negative, always complaining, always wanting something more out of her life... I am not a fan of people like that. You make a choice and you don't like the consequences... whatever...
So when I had my Dday, my psyche was shattered. I was in the 'Save what I have' mode for a while. It took me a few weeks to find myself. It would have definitely been different if we did not have children together.
We did go to MC and come to find out. In MC I got the passwords to her email. She deleted all of her emails but I was able to get a few that were not and they were from this woman. I come to find out that she knew my wife was having an affair. She had been constantly undermining our marriage. I had no clue about this. My EX would go over a drink wine at her house once a week and I was fine with it. I didn't want to be there but my EX seemed happy and so I didn't realize it was just a huge ***** session.
The email I found was that they needed to talk, my EX and the toxic friend... M... is going out of town for work and K... is coming in town.
When we were separated, my EX lived with her for a few months... 3 doors down, very retarded... I cut her off financially. My EX would want my kids to go over there. She was hoping that my youngest and the daughter of her toxic friend would be bf/gf... I squashed that.
I told my kids what this woman did. I made it known to them that while she was not the downfall of our marriage, she had no right interfering into our marriage and that is not something that should be overlooked.
My kids took some of their anger out on her. They stopped being friends with her children. The woman decided that she needed to move so they moved away. I was very happy with that. I moved a month later.
It has been the ongoing thought that one of my old neighbors and I have is that this woman was miserable and was having an affair vicariously through my wife. It was nice for her. Misery loves company. She would not be affected by the devastation she helped bring. I will actually close my book on them after my custody battle is ended.
I had told my EX that this person who was considered to be her best friend was not a friend at all. My EX and her best friend do not speak to one another any more. It is amazing and so easily foreseeable that after the affair was over the toxic friend had no more use for my EX. My EX and this toxic friend are not friends any more. I guess that was another dose of reality for my EX.
I am just amazed at how many WS have had toxic friends. I don't hang around guys who don't have my morals. I just don't. It's simple. I was just curious as to how pervasive the toxic friends are in the affairs or not.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment