Long story...semi-short.
Married to my husband 25 years. Separated last year July due being incompatible - that's my view, not his. I have tried to separate in the past, many years back a few times, but the guilt and his persistence got the better of me.
So basically, I've had my hand on the door for more years than I care to remember. His mood swings have been intolerable. I am a glass half full type, he is the glass half empty. He does not want separation. I have been miserable. An unhappy household with many arguments. Not much in the way of laughter.
We separated last year July and I moved into another house, he asked me to come back. I agreed to try again, Fast forward 6 months and unfortunately it didn't work out. I told him early October I can't live this way and told him I want a divorce.
Now both of us are living in our house until it gets sold (along with our daughter). It is difficult, no doubt. I'm trying to make it as normal as possible (if there is such a thing) for our daughter. She is 21 and is wondering why I decided to go back and try again. She knows what I've been dealing with.
He decided to buy me out of the house and got the ok from the bank last week. Within one hour of the approval he lost his job. I can't believe his bad luck. I said that he shouldn't worry about money, I will cover expenses until he gets a job. Some of my friends told me I shouldn't have offered that. But how can you kick a dog while he's down?
He is not in a good way. He seems quite depressed. It's hard living like this. I'm trying to deal with the guilt and having someone so negative around all the time.
I was going to try and move out but there is no way this is happening now. Has anyone been in this situation? I try to talk to him to motivate him but to no avail. Any advice would be appreciated. I want to help him, but given that we are separated, should I be backing off?
Married to my husband 25 years. Separated last year July due being incompatible - that's my view, not his. I have tried to separate in the past, many years back a few times, but the guilt and his persistence got the better of me.
So basically, I've had my hand on the door for more years than I care to remember. His mood swings have been intolerable. I am a glass half full type, he is the glass half empty. He does not want separation. I have been miserable. An unhappy household with many arguments. Not much in the way of laughter.
We separated last year July and I moved into another house, he asked me to come back. I agreed to try again, Fast forward 6 months and unfortunately it didn't work out. I told him early October I can't live this way and told him I want a divorce.
Now both of us are living in our house until it gets sold (along with our daughter). It is difficult, no doubt. I'm trying to make it as normal as possible (if there is such a thing) for our daughter. She is 21 and is wondering why I decided to go back and try again. She knows what I've been dealing with.
He decided to buy me out of the house and got the ok from the bank last week. Within one hour of the approval he lost his job. I can't believe his bad luck. I said that he shouldn't worry about money, I will cover expenses until he gets a job. Some of my friends told me I shouldn't have offered that. But how can you kick a dog while he's down?
He is not in a good way. He seems quite depressed. It's hard living like this. I'm trying to deal with the guilt and having someone so negative around all the time.
I was going to try and move out but there is no way this is happening now. Has anyone been in this situation? I try to talk to him to motivate him but to no avail. Any advice would be appreciated. I want to help him, but given that we are separated, should I be backing off?
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