Alright, so, for a while now I've been trying to get into a more serious relationship, I know, I'm 19 and have a very long time before I should be thinking about getting tied down but I don't know, I'm feeling it. Problem is nobody else seems to be. My mates seem to have no trouble pulling (I know that's a different thing to trying for a relationship but it's still a point) while I'm usually the wheel on his own.
I've been told before that I'm ahead of my years by people in their 30's-50's and tend to look at life more seriously and logically, I'm also incredibly shy when it comes to meeting someone new to the point where I will have to have seen them a few times before I even start talking to them, which is a problem and something I try not to do. I've also recently started taking better care of my skin, began styling my hair and have updated my wardrobe but no matter how hard I try, it never seems to go the way I want it to.
Most of the time, I'm able to have a good conversation with girls and although I'm not 100% sure, I believe I'm capable of striking up at least a bit of interest from some, the problem then is something always seems to get in the way, whether it be the girl being interested in someone else, getting back with their ex, using me to get with a friend, and a whole other manner of things. Basically, rejection has become a normal part of my life in the last several years.
Rejection has caused a huge decrease in my confidence which has turned me into the shy person I mentioned that is literally scared to talk to a girl I've just met, out of fear that she'll find me weird or something else that's negative.
Here's the part I don't understand... The majority of girls around my age (I tend to stick to a 2-year difference rule) seem to complain relentlessly about how guys are... Let's call them undesirable, and they just want a nice guy, and I might sound conceited but I consider myself a nice guy, never cheated (and would never), hate hurting girls and hate people that hurt girls, kind and compliment, generally treating them right... Now, I go to a girl I'm interested in (and this is entirely based on personality), get to know them while they get to know me (I make sure they know I don't just want to be friends and give hints along the way), and somehow I end up getting rejected for another undesirable or simply get placed into the friendzone.
How can I change this?
I've been told before that I'm ahead of my years by people in their 30's-50's and tend to look at life more seriously and logically, I'm also incredibly shy when it comes to meeting someone new to the point where I will have to have seen them a few times before I even start talking to them, which is a problem and something I try not to do. I've also recently started taking better care of my skin, began styling my hair and have updated my wardrobe but no matter how hard I try, it never seems to go the way I want it to.
Most of the time, I'm able to have a good conversation with girls and although I'm not 100% sure, I believe I'm capable of striking up at least a bit of interest from some, the problem then is something always seems to get in the way, whether it be the girl being interested in someone else, getting back with their ex, using me to get with a friend, and a whole other manner of things. Basically, rejection has become a normal part of my life in the last several years.
Rejection has caused a huge decrease in my confidence which has turned me into the shy person I mentioned that is literally scared to talk to a girl I've just met, out of fear that she'll find me weird or something else that's negative.
Here's the part I don't understand... The majority of girls around my age (I tend to stick to a 2-year difference rule) seem to complain relentlessly about how guys are... Let's call them undesirable, and they just want a nice guy, and I might sound conceited but I consider myself a nice guy, never cheated (and would never), hate hurting girls and hate people that hurt girls, kind and compliment, generally treating them right... Now, I go to a girl I'm interested in (and this is entirely based on personality), get to know them while they get to know me (I make sure they know I don't just want to be friends and give hints along the way), and somehow I end up getting rejected for another undesirable or simply get placed into the friendzone.
How can I change this?
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