I really need some outside advice on a situation I'm in at the moment with this guy.
Basically, he's an international student. We've been really friendly since our course began, and we first got with each other on a night out a while ago.. then a couple of weeks later we got with each other again (again on a night out).
I'm absolutely head spun about what to do about this though, because I really like him but he's going back to his home country after this year to carry on with higher education there.
we got onto chatting the other day about what the score is between us is.
The thing is we've both agreed we really, really like each other, he was very honest and said he really did like getting to know me..
I haven't felt this way about anyone in ages. I sounds so cheesy but I seriously just get butterflies every time I see him. Everything he does just makes me want to smile. I just feel so happy when I'm with him. I haven't felt like this since my ex who I broke up with about at the start of 2011. Ever since then, every time I've got involved with someone its always had to end because of circumstance. Either I'm moving away or they're moving away and its always had a definite end point. Its really started to get to me how it just always ends that way and I never seem to land anything potentially longer lasting.
I said this to him and said how I wasn't sure if it was better we left it as friends... as even though we may date, keep it chilled and it doesnt go anywhere... its just too much of a risk to take if things do carry on and we're faced with an international long distance situation at the end of the year... I said I'd rather face the concept of it being long distance than having a definite end... but that we'd probably not have been together long enough for it to have a foundation strong enough to withstand that?..
I know its so many what ifs etc and I should just live in the moment but I'm genuinely so scared of getting hurt again.
He seemed really down when we were talking about it and for a moment he was sort of like "well.. I could stay" but I stopped him and said he couldn't stay here just on account of me.
It just feels so wrong now "just being friends" every time I see him I just feel awful and when its just the two of us and we're saying goodbye it just feels like we're both wanting to lean into hug/ kiss goodbye but we have to stop ourselves.
I don't know what to do, it just feels like a lose / lose situation.
I really don't want to just be mates with him, I love spending time alone with him but I don't feel I can now because of what we've agreed to leave it as.
There's still so much chemistry between us and I don't know if I'm going to be able to carry on without saying something :/
If anyone has any words of wisdom about this i'd be very grateful.
Basically, he's an international student. We've been really friendly since our course began, and we first got with each other on a night out a while ago.. then a couple of weeks later we got with each other again (again on a night out).
I'm absolutely head spun about what to do about this though, because I really like him but he's going back to his home country after this year to carry on with higher education there.
we got onto chatting the other day about what the score is between us is.
The thing is we've both agreed we really, really like each other, he was very honest and said he really did like getting to know me..
I haven't felt this way about anyone in ages. I sounds so cheesy but I seriously just get butterflies every time I see him. Everything he does just makes me want to smile. I just feel so happy when I'm with him. I haven't felt like this since my ex who I broke up with about at the start of 2011. Ever since then, every time I've got involved with someone its always had to end because of circumstance. Either I'm moving away or they're moving away and its always had a definite end point. Its really started to get to me how it just always ends that way and I never seem to land anything potentially longer lasting.
I said this to him and said how I wasn't sure if it was better we left it as friends... as even though we may date, keep it chilled and it doesnt go anywhere... its just too much of a risk to take if things do carry on and we're faced with an international long distance situation at the end of the year... I said I'd rather face the concept of it being long distance than having a definite end... but that we'd probably not have been together long enough for it to have a foundation strong enough to withstand that?..
I know its so many what ifs etc and I should just live in the moment but I'm genuinely so scared of getting hurt again.
He seemed really down when we were talking about it and for a moment he was sort of like "well.. I could stay" but I stopped him and said he couldn't stay here just on account of me.
It just feels so wrong now "just being friends" every time I see him I just feel awful and when its just the two of us and we're saying goodbye it just feels like we're both wanting to lean into hug/ kiss goodbye but we have to stop ourselves.
I don't know what to do, it just feels like a lose / lose situation.
I really don't want to just be mates with him, I love spending time alone with him but I don't feel I can now because of what we've agreed to leave it as.
There's still so much chemistry between us and I don't know if I'm going to be able to carry on without saying something :/
If anyone has any words of wisdom about this i'd be very grateful.
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